Yes, we know she gave birth to the love of your life but to be perfectly honest, your mother-in-law’s (MIL) antics surely do- at least sometimes- drive you up the wall. Planning your wedding, what with never-ending expenses and countless vendor appointments, can be chaotic enough without her causing drama. When she does, life can be simply too much to handle.
Like it or not, she’s about to be family so you need to learn how to handle the issues that may come up. Here is some advice.
Give her some responsibility:
It’s always nice to involve your MIL in some kind of way. If you know she’s crafty get her to make something, whether it’s wedding favours, a stationery element, a welcome board, etc. If she’s not crafty, think of something you can put her in charge of like placing the name cards on the table or checking that the minister’s on time.
Even if you know your wedding coordinator is already taking care of this, she won’t know and will still feel that she has an important task. Remember, this is a big day for her as too and most of the time she only means well. She also likes telling her friends what her involvement was on the day.
It’s also important to communicate from the start how the planning process is going to work and who is in charge of what. Communication is key at all times! Let your MIL know how you feel before a big explosion happens. Tell her that advice is always welcome, but this is your special day and she must please respect your final decisions.
This is also where a wedding coordinator becomes very handy. Tell your wedding coordinator to relay a message over to your MIL without her knowing the message comes from you.
The money issue:
If your MIL is contributing a large amount of money to your wedding, that does not mean you must stand back and let her take over. This day is 100% about you and your fiancé, and later on in life you want to look back on your photos and still be wowed by the amazing day you had. You don’t want to look back and see your MIL’s style on your best day ever.
To ensure that your wedding is a true reflection of who you and your fiancé are as a couple, you could cut your guest list in half, and have a small and simple wedding for your absolute nearest and dearest, which you can afford to pay for yourselves. Rather do this than have a wedding including things that your MIL wants, yet which you don’t want at all.
Change of plans:
If your mother-in-law goes behind your back to arrange or change plans with a wedding vendor, you need to act quickly to end this. Make sure to inform the vendor that you had no knowledge of the order and it was done behind your back, but that they can cancel the order as it’s not going through. Once again: this is where a wedding coordinator comes in handy!
To prevent this from happening again, let your MIL know that if she sees something or would like something to be at the wedding, she needs to talk to you first. The two of you can then decide together whether it will fit in at your wedding or not.
Uninvited guests:
Unfortunately, there is only so much you can do if people were formally invited to your wedding without your permission. To avoid this situation, make sure you and your fiancé are in charge of sending out the wedding invitations.
If you do find yourself in this predicament it looks worse to uninvite people, so it may be best to inform your wedding coordinator that there are going to be guests who you didn’t know were invited, and they could place these guests at a table right at the back.
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Comfort is key during your wedding, and what’s comfier than a pair of sneakers? Bend the rules and rock your favourite pair on your big day
Wedding sneakers are all the rage right now. You have the option of wearing them all day or styling some dress shoes for the ceremony before swapping out for your favourite sneakers to dance all night long during the reception.
For an extra special touch, you can even have your sneakers customised to match your suit. Go matchy-matchy with your partner and have ‘husband’ and ‘wife’ or ‘husband’ and ‘husband’ written on the back for an epic picture.
Check out these awesome gents rocking cool kicks:
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A new study has found that variations in a specific gene could possibly determine how successful your marriage is in the first few years of your union.
Data by researchers at the University of Arkansas published in the journal Nature Scientific Report indicates that a variation called ‘CC’ in the gene CD38 is linked with increased levels of gratitude. The University’s Anastasia Makhanova, along with her colleagues studied a group of genotyped newlyweds to explore whether this gene variation had a relationship with levels of trust, forgiveness and marriage satisfaction.
“We were interested in seeing if some of the reasons that people might have a harder time maintaining relationship satisfaction in the newlywed period is due to some potential underlying genetic predispositions,” explained Makhanova.
The research team analysed 71 couples which amount to 142 newlyweds. They collected data over the course of the first three months of their marriages and had them complete a survey every four months for three years.
Analysts then compared the survey results between those with and without the CD38 variation and found that those with the variation reported higher levels of positive perceptions around their relationship, especially when it came to trust.
“CC individuals felt more grateful for their partner, reported higher trust in their partner, were more forgiving of their partner, and were more satisfied with their marriages than were AC/AA individuals,” the study read.
They thus conclude that there may be a possible genetic link to marriage satisfaction. However, it is important to note that this does not mean that those without the variation are doomed to a loveless marriage.
Makhanova explains: “So it’s not that people who don’t have the CC genotype are doomed to have problems. It’s just that they’re more likely to have issues in some of these domains, and so those people might have to work a little bit more in those domains.”
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Paris Hilton is engaged! The socialite turned entrepreneur and DJ said yes to boyfriend Carter Reum on Saturday, February 13 after being together for over a year.
Reum popped the question while on a trip on a private island to celebrate Hilton’s 40th birthday on February 17.
Taking to social media, Hilton announced their exciting news with a sweet caption.
“When you find your soulmate, you don’t just know it. You feel it. My love & I have been together since our first date, and for my birthday, he arranged a special trip to tropical paradise. As we walked to dinner along the beach, Carter led us to a cabana adorned with flowers and dropped to one knee. I said yes, yes to forever. There’s no one I’d rather spend forever with.”
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Her engagement ring was designed by Jean Dousset, the great-grandson of Louis Cartier, reports PEOPLE Magazine.
After the proposal, the pair enjoyed an intimate celebration with family members, such as Hilton’s sister Nicky.
Hilton and Reum, a businessman and family friend, have been dating since November 2019. They have known each other for 15 years, and have been together for over a year.
“I’ve known him for 15 years. Then [Reum’s sister Halle Hammond] invited us to Thanksgiving and we just had this incredible chemistry. We had our first date and haven’t spent a night apart since. It’s pretty amazing,” she told People Magazine.
“After my last breakup, I thought I was going to be alone forever,” she says. “I was like, I give up. I’ll just focus on myself. I don’t need anyone. So to have actually fallen in love, I just feel so grateful.”
This is the starlet’s fourth engagement. Hilton was previously engaged to model Jason Shaw and Greek shipping heir Paris Latsis in the 2000s, and called off her engagement to actor Chris Zylka in 2018.
Picture: Instgram / Paris Hilton