Growing up, I remember watching old wedding videos of my parents, uncles and aunts. Recorded on bulky video tapes that required patience and a steady hand to rewind. While fashion, cakes and decor have clearly evolved, one thing remained constant across every recording. The traditional vows.
Decades later, vows are still the emotional anchor of a wedding day. Yet how couples choose to share them has changed. While traditional wording remains popular, many modern couples are embracing personal vows.
There is something deeply romantic about that choice.
For some, speaking deeply personal words in front of a room full of people feels daunting. Private personal vows remove that pressure, allowing couples to speak honestly, emotionally and without restraint.
Personal vows can take many forms. Some couples choose to exchange them during a first look, before the ceremony begins. Others prefer to write their vows in letters, read quietly on the morning of the wedding or the day before. Choosing to keep personal vows private does not mean excluding guests from the meaning of the ceremony. Many couples still choose to exchange traditional vows in front of loved ones, allowing their commitment to be witnessed, while saving their most personal words for a moment shared only between the two of them.
This shift also reflects a broader change in how couples approach their weddings. Less about tradition for tradition’s sake, and more about intention. Personal vows, whether shared publicly or privately, become less of a performance and more of a genuine exchange.
What makes personal vows so compelling is not when or where they are shared, but the freedom they offer. There are no rules, no required wording and no audience to consider.
Whether spoken aloud, written down or quietly exchanged, personal vows remind us that at the heart of every wedding is a promise. And sometimes, the most powerful promises are the ones shared in private.
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Feature image: Pexels
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