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    5 ways to honour lost loved ones on your big day

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    Losing a family member is heartbreaking – and when it comes to getting married, their absence is often amplified. Acknowledging these special people can become overwhelming, especially when trying to maintain a celebratory atmosphere throughout your day.

    Fortunately, weddings are sentimental occasions, leaving room for a myriad of ways to acknowledge those dearly departed. The trick is to strike a balance – honouring loved ones without turning your big day into a memorial service. Whether the gesture be small and personalised or open and public, there is always a tasteful way to do it.

    Here are five simple and subtle ways to remember someone passed at your wedding:

    Attach a small photo to your bouquet: This is particularly meaningful for a bride who has lost her father – a highly personal yet subtle gesture that is the perfect little reminder that your dad is walking you down the aisle in spirit.

     

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    Incorporate old fabric into your suit or wedding gown: Keep the spirit of your lost loved ones close by – literally. Use mom’s wedding dress to create your own gown, or transform one of dad’s old ties into a trendy pocket square.

     

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    Reserve a seat at the ceremony: Of course nothing compares to having your loved ones physically by your side but reserving them a seat while you say your “I dos” can be a special reminder of their irreplaceable presence. Mark their seat with a favorite flower or sentimental possession.

     

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    Set up a photo display: This is a great option for couples who want to keep their tribute lighthearted. It avoids creating a heavy atmosphere for guests as family members can step aside to acknowledge deceased family members in private.

     

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    Dedicate a song: Whether it is your first dance or just a casual slot on the playlist, dedicate a song to someone no longer around. Levels of discretion can be altered to your personal taste here; make a grand gesture with an announcement or toast or simply appreciate the special moment to yourself.

     

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    How to feel comfortable in front of the camera at your wedding

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    On your wedding day you will be photographed a lot. This can be extremely daunting if you are not used to being in front of the camera. To ensure you get the pictures you’ve always dreamed of, we’ve rounded up some useful tips to help you feel comfortable in front of your wedding photographer.

    Hire a photographer you are comfortable with

    We know you have envisioned this day down to the finest detail, especially your pictures. Choose a photographer whose work you’ve seen and love. An initial meet-up with your photographer will establish a relationship and help ease any butterflies. And remember to communicate! The photographer needs to know what you want from your pictures, if you’re feeling uncomfortable about anything or if you have any questions – speak up, but trust your photographer to deliver on getting you the best pictures possible.

    Book a pre-wedding/engagement shoot with the same photographer

    Consider this a trial run. It’s easier to pose for someone you have posed for before. You and your fiancé can then warm up to the feeling of being in front of the camera. This will allow you to see how you interact with the camera, as well as each other, while getting a feel for the photographer’s work.

     

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    Being in a long distance relationship isn’t easy. Get it right, and it won’t break your relationship, it’ll make it. But how?!⠀ ⚡️⠀ SET SOME GROUND RULES, AND STICK TO THEM!⠀ Make a rule about the maximum amount of time you’re willing to go without seeing one another. Depending on how far apart you are, this could be anything from a few days to a few months. The one important thing is that you respect this rule – it’s what your relationship needs and deserves if it’s going to survive.⠀ ✨⠀ SHARE WHAT’S GOING ON EVERY DAY!⠀ If you’re in different time zone and a daily call isn’t possible, then you could instead write each other a daily email with your news. In years to come you’ll be able to look back at exactly how you felt doing this long distance thing, and see just how far you’ve come together.⠀ ?⠀ MAKE YOUR TIME TOGETHER AS ‘NORMAL’ AS POSSIBLE!⠀ The normal ‘couple-stuff’ is the essence of a relationship. It’s nights in on a the sofa watching Netflix and binging on junk food. It’s walks in the park. It’s cuddles in bed. It’s simply being together, with no agenda. Make time for these moments of normality to express themselves in your relationship, even though your time together is scarce. ⛰⠀ The right person is worth waiting for, and in the meantime, the long distance will just make it all the more exciting and intimate when you do get to share time together.
?
Calling all couples in long distance relationships: How do you make it work? •⠀ Photos by @nabazabihphotography

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    Allocate enough time for the picture session on your wedding day

    No one ever likes to be rushed, so make sure you have enough time with your photographer. He or she will typically tell you how much time they need and where to slot it into the schedule. Having enough time means you’ll experience a sense of calm and have the freedom to explore poses, light and locations without worrying about running out of time.

    Skip the drinks, for now.

    A glass of champagne to ease the nerves is perfectly fine but any more can have you feeling a bit tipsy, especially if you haven’t had anything to eat. Alcohol can also cause your skin to flush, so rather leave those drinks for the reception.

    Focus on each other

    You just said “I do”. Look into the eyes of one another and allow the photographer to capture those special moments, almost as if no one else is around you. Sometimes it’s not about the perfect pose or perfect smile, it’s about capturing a joyous, genuine moment.

    Consider your posture

    Having a good posture will ooze confidence so remember – shoulders back, lift your chin to elongate your neck, breathe and smile. Don’t hunch your shoulders over, this can result in you looking small and uncomfortable. Your photographer will guide you and have your best features in mind, so trust them with their recommendations, even if it seems a little crazy.

    Get your hair and make-up done professionally

    Looking like the best version of yourself will give you a burst of confidence and make your pictures look flawless. Your hair stylist and make-up artist knows what works well on camera and what will last for the entire day/night, so it’s essential to have them in your arsenal too.

    Embrace the moment and have fun

    Nothing reflects better in photos than a genuine feeling. Be yourself and have fun – don’t take it too seriously!

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    What to pack in your bridal emergency kit

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    This is vital information for every bride and some grooms too. Being prepared means that you’re already one step ahead of any emergency that might pop up on your wedding day. Keep these essentials handy to ensure you’re ready for any mishap thrown your way:

    Painkillers

    No bride wants to be buckled down by headaches on her most important day, so throw some Panados or any pain medication of your choice into your clutch to be prepared for any, literal, headaches.

    Snacks

    Having a small snack on hand will keep your blood sugar levels balanced and wonʼt leave you feeling lightheaded or ill when the nerves and jitters of the wedding day take over.

    Mints

    Pack in some mints to be ready (and fresh) for that ‘you may kiss the bride’ moment.

    Lipstick

    A day filled with activities like eating, dancing and kissing will definitely lead to a lipstick touch-up being needed if you want to be photo-ready at all times.

    Tissues

    Your wedding day will of course be filled with tears of joy so be prepared with some tissues.

    Perfume

    Having a signature perfume to use on your wedding day will leave you with a cherished scent to  serve as a reminder of this special day.

    Hand cream

    Your wedding ring will look dazzling on a pair of soft and moisturised hands, especially for those close-up ring shots.

    Pocket Mirror

    An essential item to have for a quick make-up touchup during teary-eyed speeches.

    Safety Pins

    These will come in handy if you come across any snags or broken zips on your dress, or if the groom happens to lose a button.

    Picture: K-Leigh Siebritz/HSM Images; Styled by Larissa Vermeulen & Mariska van Zyl

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    Which classic wedding hairstyle is right for you?

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    When it comes to hairstyles for your wedding day, you need to take account for the type of hair that you have. This will help to determine what kind of style will work best.

    You also need to consider what comes with each style in terms of needed products and up-keep/touch ups. If you don’t want to worry about what your hair looks like, then choose a style that is quite structured. These generally come with little maintenance.

    For styles that are less structured, as you will either have to have a touch up at some point or accept the fact that your hair will look different to how it was when the wedding started.

    So let’s take a look at each classic hairstyle and you can decide which one will work best for you.

    Bun

    You can choose a high bun or a low bun, both are elegant looks. A bun keeps your hair in place for the whole event. It is also a great option if you don’t like having your hair in your face. It’s also great for those who get hot easily as having the back of the neck open helps one to keep cool. The bun style also allows for you to add hair accessories or clip your veil into the bun.

    Half up/half down

     

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    This is hairstyle is for those who want to keep their hair out of their face but still want the flowing look. It is, however, difficult to keep the hair in place throughout the wedding. If you do decide on this style, you should be okay with your hair being a little messier towards the end of the event. This style works for most hair lengths and textures.

    Ponytail

     

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    You can do a high ponytail or a low one for a more romantic look. This style allows you to keep your hair out of your face and works for short and long, thick and thin hair. It also shapes your face.

    Loose, flowing curls

    This is an effortless and laid-back look. It works for most hair lengths and textures. Those with thicker hair might need a touch up as the weight of the hair will cause the curls to drop. Also, those with difficult hair will have to be weary of the weather because frizz is a real thing.

    Braids

    Braids are great for creating a styled look but still making sure that your hair is structured. If you have unruly hair, then a braid would be a good option for you. The only issue that comes with braids is that for them to work best, you can’t have any layering in your hair.

    Your wedding day is one of the most memorable days of your life, so of course you want to look your best but you also want to be comfortable and enjoy the day or night without constantly worrying about your hair.

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    My favourite wedding moment

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    Wedding Etc asked a group of brides and grooms to share their best memories of their weddings … and whether there was anything they’d do differently.

    1. COMPLETE SURPRISE

    ‘The thing that I enjoyed most about my wedding was NOT the planning. I am blessed to have a fabulous mom who did everything for me, all based on three Instagram pictures I showed her when I got engaged. I walked into the venue on the day not knowing a thing – I was blown away and appreciated every little detail. I felt like it was done for and not by me, which only made me feel more special on my special day. It’s a cliché, but it was a fairy tale and I thoroughly enjoyed every single bit of it. Thank God for moms!’
    – Zakia

    2. LIKE A PRINCESS

    ‘Being all dressed up isn’t usually me. I’m normally a plain Jane, but on the day, I felt like a completely different person with all of the make-up, the jewellery and the dress – like a princess!’
    – Paashanta

    3. DREAM GOWN

    ‘My most memorable moment was when my father told me how proud he was of me. After that, he walked me down the aisle with the biggest smile on his face. We decided to have a small wedding, so my dress wasn’t anything glamorous. If I could turn back the hands of time, I would get my dream gown, regardless of how big or small the wedding was.’
    – Stephanie

    4. LOVE IN BRAZIL

    ‘We started dating in Rio while we were doing mission work for our church. A few months later, we got married. There with no notice, and we wouldn’t change a thing about our small, impromptu South American wedding. I would have preferred it if my husband hadn’t left his honeymoon packing for the last minute (making him late for our wedding), but at least we can laugh about it now.’
    – Verna

    5. CAUGHT ON CAMERA

    ‘I enjoyed how relaxed the atmosphere was, despite it being my wedding. We had a destination wedding, so our entire family was on this relaxed holiday buzz. It was so refreshing and it made everyone that much more present. If we could change one thing, it would probably be our video. We spent so much time, money and effort on the photographer that, come time and budget for the videographer, we were quite limited. Our video is beautiful and captures the memories, but seeing how professionally done it could have been, with the fantastic technology nowadays, we secretly want to redo ours!’
    – Hassan

    6. RAIN DANCE

    ‘We got married in late December, and in a rain-starved Western Cape, so we didn’t really think we needed to have a plan in case the skies opened up. Well, they did – our wedding day was the only day it rained that whole summer. It was a blessing in disguise, though, because our very small wedding party all ended up huddling under a garden umbrella together, drinking wine (and the odd shot of tequila), laughing, smiling and taking turns to dance in the rain. Weddings don’t always go to plan, but they often turn out better than you could’ve ever imagined.’
    – Andrea

    7. LAUGHING ALL THE WAY

    ‘The best part of my wedding day was how much fun I had. I expected it to be a stressful day, but that wasn’t the case at all. My husband and I laughed so much and we weren’t stressed at all. The only thing
    I regret is that we didn’t take enough photos and I wish we had planned a bit better when it came to time management.’
    – Yumna

    8. THE FIRST LOOK

    ‘The best part of my wedding day was when I saw my wife for the first time. She looked absolutely angelic. It was at that moment that I realised that I would be spending every day with the most beautiful woman in the world. I don’t think there’s anything I would change about that day.’
    – Rameez

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    Throw the best wedding ever in 7 simple steps

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    Want a truly unforgettable wedding day? Of course you do! Pull it all together and throw the best wedding ever with our simple 7-step guide.

    1. CONSIDER HIRING A WEDDING PLANNER

    Many couples set out thinking they can accomplish planning a wedding on their own. In the case of smaller weddings, this is definitely achievable, but if you have big plans for yours, hiring an experienced professional is the way to go. Other than having the benefit of them taking the reins and allowing you to really enjoy yourselves, wedding planners can customise specific packages according to your needs and budget, and recommend trusted vendors they have worked with in the past.

    2. TAKE TIME TO GREET ALL OF YOUR GUESTS

    Some of them will have travelled from far just to attend your wedding. Show them just how much you appreciate their presence by taking time to greet everyone. It doesn’t have to be all at once – spread the quality time throughout the evening so you get around to spending time with each person; whether it be a quick chat over a drink, visiting their table during dinner, or shaking it out later on the dance floor.

    3. SPEND 20 MINUTES JUST ENJOYING THE MOMENT

    It may seem like an obvious thing to do, but you’ll probably be so wrapped up in other aspects of the wedding that you may even forget to just take a deep breath, relax and live in the present moment. Set aside a few minutes to tell your spouse how much you appreciate them and how you’re looking forward to experiencing this next chapter of your lives together.

    4. CREATE CHARGING STATIONS

    We’re sure you don’t want your guests glued to their phones the entire night, but having a few plug points with chargers available in well-placed areas is a nice (not to mention modern) way to show your guests you care. This will also encourage them to capture some pics for Instagram, so be sure to put up a sign nearby with your wedding hashtag if you have one.

    5. HAVE AN MC

    While it may seem unnecessarily formal, choosing a family member or friend with a commanding voice to be the master of ceremonies on the day will come in handy for announcements or gathering people for group photos. Try to keep speeches to a minimum to maximise dining and social time.

    6. ASK FOR SONG REQUESTS

    A great way to make sure your guests are grooving it up on the dance floor until the early hours is to ask them for song ideas. Lock down the ones that are most special to you and your partner first, but pepper the big day with submissions from your friends and family. Ask them to RSVP with their top pick, or allow them to ask the DJ to play their favourite tracks on the day.

    7. SERVE LATE-NIGHT SNACKS

    If you plan to extend the wedding festivities late into the night, you may want to cater for those still standing. The last thing you want is for your guests to go home hungry, so hire a food truck to dish out midnight snacks, such as boerie rolls, popcorn cones and gourmet sliders, or simply order a few pizzas for the really ravenous. A coffee stand is also a great option – guests will be grateful for a warming pick-me up.

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    How to decide who gets an invite to your wedding

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    In terms of wedding decisions, choosing who will – and won’t – be getting an invite to your big day is right up there with the date and the dress. Unless you’re in a position to cater for 500 of your closest acquaintances, you’re going to have to be selective. So … who makes the cut?

    START WITH WHAT YOU KNOW

    Ultimately, the maximum number of invitations you send out depends on your budget and the size of your venue. Once you know how many guests you can afford or accommodate, you can start tailoring the guest list to match.

    DON’T PLAY A NUMBERS GAME

    A 50-50 split between you and your fiancé sounds logical, but don’t be constrained by ratios. You’ll definitely have some friendships that overlap. Plus, if one of you has a smaller family, there’s no point filling that ‘side’ with nice-to-have acquaintances while the other person has to tell a beloved uncle that there’s just no more room.

    BUSINESS AND PLEASURE

    It’s a reality that you spend as much time with your colleagues as you do with your fiancé. But do you want them at your wedding? Do you ever socialise with them other than after-work drinks? Do your topics of conversation start and end with bashing that annoying client? Have they met your husband- or wife-to-be? Do you see them still being in your life if you changed jobs? Be tactful in inviting those who do pass muster by keeping wedding office chatter to a minimum.

    ‘YOU REMEMBER AUNT SANDRA…’

    Family is where you’re likely to run into trouble; it’s a mire of obligation and potential for someone to take offence. This is where blanket rules become handy. For example, not inviting family members you haven’t seen in years, or who haven’t met your fiancé. Sticking to rules leaves little room for those who don’t make the list to complain.

    IT’S MY PARTY

    Your parents and future in-laws may expect to have a say in the guest list, especially if they’re helping to pay for it. They may want to invite friends who watched you grow up – or maybe just want to show off to the Joneses across the street. Allocate the parents an equal number of guest suggestions, but let them know the final decision rests with you. And stick to your guns – the only people you should invite are those you couldn’t imagine celebrating it without.

    A LESSON IN BEING RUTHLESS

    1.  ‘My number-one rule was that I wouldn’t meet anyone for the first time on my wedding day,’ says Storm Wilkinson, who put a ring on it in 2013. ‘I’m sorry if you’ve been dating for “like a million years” – I don’t know them, they’re not coming. Budgets are a harsh reality.’
    2. Once you’ve worked out a per-head cost, apply it to any guests you’re on the fence about. If spending that figure on that person makes you go: ‘Pffft,’ take their name off the list.
    3. Avoid fake-smiling on your wedding day. ‘You don’t want to have anyone at your wedding that you have to pretend to be happy to see,’ says Aleisha McCormack, host of The Bridechilla podcast. ‘Ditch them.’

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    10 ways to go green on your wedding day

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    With a strong emphasis on living a sustainable life, there is more and more pressure to go green in all aspects of our lives – and that includes your wedding day. But going green for your big day is a lot easier than you think, and will give you plenty of options to play around with to create a unique event. From everything including your food down to your dress, check out our top 10 ways you can make your wedding more green.

    1. LOCATION

    Your wedding venue plays a big part in how your day will look, feel and be represented, but it’s also one of the key ways to making your wedding greener. Aim to choose a location that is already promoting sustainability with their food, electricity, water usage, etc. This will make it easier for you when sorting out your decor and catering. To save on fuel, try to find a venue that is more central so that most of your guests can carpool and travel shorter distances.

    2. STATIONERY

    When it comes to creating greener stationery, there’s plenty to play around with. Apart from it being a major trend in the digital era, creating a wedding website where your guests can find all the details and RSVP saves you on paper (and printing costs). As for the menus, seating charts and stationery present at the wedding, you can get creative with materials like recycled cotton for that high-end look. You can also get away with only one menu per table, instead of giving one to each individual guest.

    3. DIY

    While DIY doesn’t necessarily equal planet-friendly, creating things yourself will help you keep track of the materials and methods you’re using so that you can avoid anything harmful. Don’t be afraid to reach out to friends and family for second-hand or recycled goods that can be used to for your wedding decor. For example, placing candles or organic flowers inside old mason jars can create a rustic look on the tables for your wedding reception.

    4. FLOWERS

    Source the flowers for your wedding from a local organic florist, or even plant them and pick them yourself from your garden. Try to use florals that don’t require a lot of water – succulents are beautiful and modern – and create a beautifully unique arrangement. They can even serve as your wedding favours too, so your guests can take them home and plant them in their own gardens.

    5. FAVOURS

    There is a wide variety of thoughtful and fun wedding favours when it comes to sticking to green options. Spoil your guests with some herbal tea leaves and a personalised ‘Thank You’ note, or offer them organic seeds that they can grow at home to symbolise your new journey of growth with your loved one. Plants, birdseed or homemade organic beauty products are also lovely options.

    6. THE DRESS

    Every bride wants that special and unique dress that feels perfectly made for her, but this can be an expensive and taxing reality. It’s much greener and cheaper to hire a dress or have a vintage one altered to suit you. However, if you do plan on buying a dress or having one made, aim to use more planet-friendly materials and create a piece that you will be able to wear again or pass down.

    7. FOOD

    If your venue is sustainable and offers catering, it’s a perfect deal! If not, look for a caterer that makes use of organic produce. Maybe even opt for going completely meat-free for your wedding menu and serve colourful fresh foods for your guests to enjoy that have a lower impact on the environment.

    8. CONFETTI

    Instead of plastic or paper confetti, opt for flower petals (which are much softer), birdseed, grains or plant seeds. These make light and pretty confetti pieces that can be carried in hand-woven baskets or bowls to save on plastic or paper cups. They are also affordable, easy to find and utterly unique.

    9. DECOR

    Try to avoid any paper or plastic use. Rather use proper cotton napkins, bare tables and chairs, and lots of greenery. Write your table numbers on rocks, pebbles or shells, and ask friends and family for spare decorations and table settings that you can borrow just for the day. Mismatched decor may just be the next trend!

    10. RINGS

    A family heirloom or vintage ring is the perfect way to lower your environmental impact on the planet, while still spoiling your other half with something precious. Alternatively, you can source your ring from companies that work with recycled metals and gemstones and have fair trade labour practices to create a sustainable option for you and your partner.

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    How to Make a Grand Getaway at Your Wedding

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    With all the details you have to think about while planning your big day, one thing many couples often overlook is the grand getaway. After you’ve wowed your guests with your big entrance, the delicious meal, and that epic dance party, you probably won’t want the night to end. So sweeten the deal and go out with a bang! Here are 6 unique ways to bid adieu to your guests and ride off as newlyweds in style.

    1. Own your exit with an old-fashioned car. Consider renting an old-fashioned car for your grand exit. Tie a few empty cans to the bumper and hang a home-made “just married” sign in the window, and you’re set for a classic sendoff…just like in the movies. The pictures you’ll get from this getaway will look great at the end of your wedding album, hung on the wall of your entryway, or on your thank you notes!

    2. Hop in a horse and buggy. If you love horses or are just into the classic, romantic charm of a horse-drawn carriage ride, this is the getaway for you. Just be sure to have the driver bring a heavy blanket to keep you and your new spouse warm as you leisurely make your way home.

    3. Take a trolley. For couples getting married in a city where trolleys are iconic fixtures (think: New Orleans or San Francisco), leaving in a trolley can be the perfect way to bring your wedding locale’s personality into your wedding. The best part? All of your nearest and dearest can join you when you depart if you’re not ready for the night to end just yet.

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    What To Get For the Pup Who Has Everything

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    Like many of us dog lovers, I have a tendency to spoil our family dog, Bailey. How can you blame me, when he buries his nose in my couch looking for his old toys in such an adorable way? I love our guy, but the thing is, I’m skeptical about getting him new toys because he’s very particular: he only buries his favorite toys in the couch, but many of the rest of them just sit on the floor. When he was a puppy, I used to spend $40 per month on toys and treats alone (those bully sticks can get expensive)! But, in trying to find a (much) more wallet-friendly way to keep Bailey entertained, I found the absolute best gift you could get for any dog, any size, any personality.

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