A proposal should be well planned and deliberately thought out. We’re sure you’ve imagined yours before. Who hasn’t? Perhaps you saw the movie The Wedding Singer, which led you to crave a public display. Maybe you watched Leap Year, and the proposal on the ocean-side cliff led you to consider something more private.

It’s also possible that you’re not sure if you (or your partner) would prefer a public or private proposal. Consider the pros and cons of a public proposal to help you make the final decision.

Pros: 

– It will be an event to remember 

The public gesture will play like a movie in your partners head for years and years to come. It will likely be one of their fondest memories.

A public proposal also makes it easier for you to catch the moment on video or in a series of photographs. Arrange for a friend or family member to secretly record everything as it happens, and make it a moment that lasts forever.

– You can get other loved ones involved 

Sharing this special moment with people who care dearly about you (and your partner) can make it feel extremely special. You’ll get to celebrate your engagement with your loved ones as it happens. On top of that, you can share the planning and preparations for the proposal with everyone you’re inviting to relieve some of the pressure.

– It will be easier to spread the news 

If your proposal is public, everyone you care about will either be there when it happens or will find out very soon after. You won’t have to spend a day calling everyone with the good news.

Cons: 

– Might not go as planned 

If you’ve been together for a long time, and you’ve spoken about marriage, then this shouldn’t be too much of a worry. However, there is always the chance that your partner says no. In public, a “no” will feel so much worse.

On a similar note, you cannot control the environment around you. You could get caught in bad weather, your big question may be drowned out by noise, and other people may try to get involved unexpectedly.

– Unnecessary pressure

You could be putting unnecessary pressure on your partner to say yes, when they aren’t sure they’re ready to. They may feel more comfortable in a private setting to ask you to discuss the proposal and the way forward, but in public they can’t really do that.

You’ll also be putting a lot of pressure on yourself. A public proposal takes a lot of organizing and co-ordinating. If you’re not good under pressure, perhaps you should go for something more manageable.

– Expenses can pile up 

If you’re really going big, like writing “will you marry me” in the sky, you may have to spend quite a bit of money. You’ll have to decide if it’s worth it, because that money may be better spent on the wedding itself.

The most important thing to consider about a public proposal is what will be most comfortable for you and your significant other. If you don’t mind the attention and pressure, and the big gesture and fanfare has always been something you wanted, then go for it!

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