Writing wedding vows can be a daunting task. It can be overwhelming to attempt to sum up all the things that you want to say to your partner. The vows, which at the end of it only add up to a few minutes of talking, are a summary of the love you have for your partner, the promises you are making to them, and the hopes and dreams you have for your future together.
What makes this more difficult for many, is that it has to be done not only in front of your partner but also in front of all your guests.
We’ve compiled a list of tips to ensure that you’re writing the best wedding vows you can.
Things to say in your vows
– First, mention your own name and your partner’s name. There are probably many people in the audience staring at you; this could take away some of the intimacy of your vows. Emphasise the intimacy by adding something like, “I, Harry, take you, Sally.”
– Second, add some anecdotes and personal stories. The guests will enjoy listening to this, and your partner will enjoy the trip down memory lane.
– Third, make sure you’re saying meaningful things. Cute and funny stories will only get you so far. Say things that also show how serious you are about this commitment.
– This final one should be a no-brainer, but we know that the stress of vow writing can cause some forgetfulness so we’ll mention it just incase. Always say “I love you”.
– Do not, we repeat, do NOT write them at the last minute.
– Read through some samples of vows before you start writing. This may help you to work out what your tone should be and could give you some inspiration.
– Actually write your vows down. “I will remember them”, never works out.
– Cut out clichés and things that might embarrass your partner.
– Make sure your vows are not too long. Your audience may get fidgety.
– Get somebody to proofread it. An outside opinion always ensures improvements.
– Practice your vows. Say them out loud. Say them in the mirror. You’ll be nervous on the big day and the practice will ensure you’re familiar with what you want to say.
– Carry a written or typed copy of your vows with you. If you do end up stumbling on your words, this will be a great help.
– With all of these tips in mind, remember to also get creative and take into account the finer details and context of your relationship like Jimmy Gisondi, who wrote a set of vows not only for his bride, Kelsea, but also for his new step-daughter, Olivia.
In his separate vows to Olivia, he said “I promise to never treat you [like] anything less than my own child”. This thoughtful additional set of vows brought the crowd to tears.
Last but not least, don’t forget to add your personality. Your partner-to-be loves you for who you are, so staying true to yourself will make the vows unforgettable for them.