• Your maid of honour is usually your best fried and you trust her with everything regarding your big day. She is the one who’s got your back. This maid of honour fulfilled her role perfectly, but some might say she didn’t exactly approach it in the best way. She noticed that her friend’s new boyfriend acted suspiciously when they first started dating. The first red flag was when she realised he lied to her friend about the price of the ring.

    On the night, the groom-to-be decided to pop the question with a ring that still had the price tag of $599 (R8 870) on it. Fortunately, the best friend stopped him and they took the price tag off before the bride-to-be saw it, however, the best friend later found out that he had told his then-fiancée that he had bought the ring for $12,000 (R177 798).

    In a Reddit thread, the maid of honour explains how the groom then started telling outrageous stories about his life, which, according to her, seemed too outlandish to be true. He also did some suspicious things and had a history that raised red flags. For instance, he told the maid of honour and her partner that he was a millionaire but lost everything when he got divorced. He also said he used drugs with his ex-wife to try and bring her back from her addiction. The ex-wife, he said, abused him.

    Then, the maid of honour was becoming more suspicious and ran a background check on him and found that he kept changing his last name. He had been married three times before and took his ex-wives’ last names. To top that, he had an active aggravated domestic violence case, and a restraining order against him which was granted right before he met the bride.

    When the best friend told the bride-to-be about her findings and concerns, she said she knew about his previous marriages but dismissed all the other concerns saying: “It’s not like that, he had a hard life and he loves me.”

    The maid of honour decided not to be part of the wedding as she didn’t approve of the marriage and knew that her friend was landing herself in a compromising position with this man.

    But shortly before the wedding, the bride phoned her and begged her to be there. The maid of honour, wanting to protect her friend,  then decided to attend the wedding with a sign that read: “As your best friend, I OBJECT! You deserve better! Done with love xoxoxox,” taped to the back of her shirt.

    However, despite all the maid of honour’s efforts, the wedding went ahead. Regretting nothing about her objection, the maid of honour is no longer on speaking terms with her best friend. She said that even though she was sad, she has moved on.

    If you do disagree with your best friend’s choice to marry a person, the right thing to do is to gently warn her like this maid of honour did. Make sure you have your facts straight, though.

    Picture: Pexels

    “Something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue”. This wedding charm is a tradition that has been followed many betrothed couples for decades. Brides traditionally incorporate this tradition into their bridal attire, wearing something old, new, borrowed, and blue, typically obtained from loved ones. But where does this tradition come from, and why do we still do it today?

    The tradition began in the Victorian era as an English rhyme. Originally it went, “Something Olde, Something New, Something Borrowed, Something Blue, A Sixpence in your Shoe”. The final part of the rhyme is typically a British custom only, and thus largely omitted from the saying.

    Each object is meant to bring the couple good luck on their wedding day and encourage a successful marriage.

    Something Old:

    Brides were traditionally required to incorporate something old into their bridal attire to ward off evil. In the olden times, brides traditionally wore an undergarment of a woman that had already bore children as their something old. Doing this was meant to confuse the Evil Eye, who was said to cause infertility. Through this, the Evil Eye was tricked into thinking the bride was already fertile, thus leaving her alone.

    However, the more favoured meaning is that of continuity. By incorporating something old, brides carry with them something sentimental from their past.

    Typically, brides opt for heirlooms to represent their something old.

    Something New:

    As the betrothed begin their new life as a married couple, the something new acts as a symbol of optimism  for the future.

    This is the easiest and most straight-forward element to incorporate, as it can literally be anything. The easiest is to have jewellery or the wedding dress itself stand for the something new, as those will most likely be purchased brand new.

    Something Borrowed:

    Something borrowed works to bring the couple good luck on their wedding day and their marriage. Traditionally, couples are meant to borrow something from a close friend or relative that is already married and ideally has children. This way, the luck of the happily married person will rub off on the newlyweds, thus starting the marriage off on a positive note.

    As with the something old, brides were encouraged to borrow the undergarments of a close relative or friend as a positive sign of fertility.

    Nowadays, couples generally borrow things of significance from friends or family. Once again, it can be anything, from accessories to shoes.

    Something Blue:

    Blue is said to represent purity, love and fidelity, and as such has become a highly symbolic colour for weddings. It also has the bonus of warding off the Evil Eye, according to legend.

    Traditionally, brides incorporated their something blue into their garters. However, today brides can use blue in any aspect of their wedding attire to get the same effect.

    The “Sixpence in your shoe” part of the rhyme typically refers to British custom, in which a bride places a sixpence coin inside their shoe for good luck and prosperity.

    Picture: Unsplash

     

     

     

    Now, as with any other event, you can go super small, low key and toned down, or splurge and go way over the top for your wedding. It really is up to you (and your bank account).

    Wedding costs vary greatly, from one couple who tied the knot for a mere R6 000 to the infamous Gupta wedding at Sun City, topping the charts with an elaborate wedding of R30 million. Where that money came from is another story altogether. Let’s not dwell on it.

    Those are two extreme cases, and most South African couples end up dishing out something between R70 000 and R80 000, according to IOL. There are a number of things to budget for, with the venue, dress and photography being among the most expensive.

    Catering does not come cheap, either. Some couples are wonderfully happy with a small get together, maybe at their own or a friend’s home. A savvy aunt might pitch in to make the dress, and the mother-in-law knows someone who bakes.  What matters to them is being together, celebrating their choice to journey on together, surrounded by laughter and sunshine.

     

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    However, some will raise an amused eyebrow at the picture painted above. If the bride or groom is rolling in cash, they might have a completely different take on weddings. Think landing in helicopters and photoshoots with tame leopards. Entertainment for guests including classical ballerinas and acrobats. One such lavish wedding took place at Polo Estate, Val de Vie.

     

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    Remember, though, that spending crazy amounts of money on one event could lead to haunting debt for you and your loved one. Rather be realistic about your budget, get creative (and eco-friendly) so you can focus on the other person more than on the material things. There are countless ways of saving money and still have a gorgeous wedding you will remember for the rest of your life. 

    Picture: Will Cadena Photography

    A Pretoria couple couldn’t believe their luck when their friends and family got together and arranged a surprise wedding for them.

    Nompumelelo Somdaka-Ndesi (28) and Nkosiphendulo Ndesi (32) got engaged in 2018.

    “When she said ‘yes’ I was over the moon. We had built a solid friendship over the years. We were able to sit down and talk about real-life issues and I would have done anything to be with her. But the challenge is that I was broke at the time,” Nkosiphendulo told W24.

    The church they both regularly attended decided to take matters in their own hands. This is how it all went down:

    One morning after the church service, Nompumelelo went to her friend’s place for a visit.

    “When I got there, I was surprised to see a wedding dress, shoes, a wig and a make-artist. I was shocked when my friend told me that it was all for me and the church had been planning the surprise wedding for a while. Everything fit and the wig was beautiful,” exclaimed Nompumelelo.

    Meanwhile, Nkosiphendulo was surprised by another fellow church member with a suit and shoes. They were asked for their sizes separately before the day and had not picked up any hints at the time. The couple was then driven back to church separately and arrived to find a beautifully decorated church hall.

    Poor Nkosiphendulo’s first thought was wondering how he was ever going to pay for it all.

    Nompumelelo, in turn, was afraid of how her family would react to the suprise. “But, when they saw me in that white dress, I could see happiness in their faces.” Both the couple’s parents were invited.

    The couple said that they had the time of their life, and are forever thankful to their church community who made this dream come true for them.

    Picture: W24