Do's And Don'ts Archives | Page 5 of 8

In Advice

Pros and cons of writing your own wedding vows

January 30, 2020 No Comments

So your wedding day planning is coming together. You’ve got your vendors sorted out and your decor and attire is turning out perfectly. Now, you’re focusing on the finer details. Included in these details are the wedding vows.

Many couples find pleasure in writing their own wedding vows. They believe it’s more special, more personal, and a way to fully express what their partner means to them. For others, writing wedding vows is a nightmare. You’re concerned about what other people will think, if you’ll bore your guests, if you’ll speak for too long, the list of worries are endless.

If you’re still uncertain about which way you’ll go, perhaps considering the pros and cons of both will help you make your final decision.

Pros

– Your guests will be interested

The traditional wedding vows have been heard a million times before. Since you will be presenting some fresh material, your guest are likely to listen more intently and hang on your every word.

– The vows will be more personal

If you write your own wedding vows, they’ll come from your heart, from your experiences with your partner, and they’ll be based on your life together thus far. You could also talk about your hopes for the future, and paint a picture that the traditional wedding vows don’t allow.

– You can add anecdotes to make it more special

This is probably the best part about writing your own wedding vows. You’re able to tell stories. These personal anecdotes add a uniqueness to your vows, as no couple has the same stories as you.

Cons

– Public speaking is already difficult as it is

It’s likely you’ll be nervous on the day. You’ll stand in front of all your friends and family, on one of the biggest days of your life, and you’ll have to remember all those things you wrote down. It’s tougher than it looks!

But if you stick with the traditional wedding vows, theres no chance of you stumbling on your words, forgetting what you wrote or losing your place on the page in front of you.

– There is quite a bit of stress that comes with it

While writing you own wedding vows is a very special task to take on, it’s also quite stressful. You want to say all the right things, keep you audience interested, keep it short, be articulate, and the list goes on and on. This can be a lot of pressure.

If it feels too much, opt for the traditional wedding vows.

– You and your partner may have different styles

You and your partner may have vert different styles, and thus your vows may come across as a bit incompatible. Maybe you write a two page long set of vows, and your partner only writes a paragraph. This could be a bit awkward.

Image: Pixabay

In Advice

Paw-some ways to involve your pets in your wedding

January 28, 2020 No Comments

We all know that pets are part of the family! Perhaps you have adopted your furry friend as a couple, or maybe you’ve had them since you were a kid. However your fur baby came into your life, it’s likely you wouldn’t want to spend your special day without them.

While you may want to dress the little guy up in a miniature suit fitted to your pet of choice and have him be the ring bearer, this may not always be possible, or comfortable for the animal. But fret not, there are other ways you can involve your pet in your wedding day.

– Have a family photoshoot

https://www.instagram.com/p/B64nR-lhqTd/

– Include them in a squad photo

https://www.instagram.com/p/B7HaOOmA4bY/

– Let them keep you company at the altar

https://www.instagram.com/p/B4gMNrzFfzA/

– Spend some quality time with them

https://www.instagram.com/p/B2sKaglluFO/

– They can keep you company while you get ready

https://www.instagram.com/p/B4wubwMg1AD/

– Represent them on your cake / in your decor

https://www.instagram.com/p/B6_CFwbFDiJ/

– Let them bring you comfort and cuddles

https://www.instagram.com/p/B7sfegSB0jG/

– Get them some comfy wedding attire (suits may be unpleasant for some animals due to heat and other things)

https://www.instagram.com/p/B1oYfgGF4RD/

– Give them a front seat in the audience

https://www.instagram.com/p/B0ZEh6gFEkV/

– Use their faces for some photobooth fun

https://www.instagram.com/p/B7tp6nfFjVQ/

– Let them add some humour

https://www.instagram.com/p/B4NIpwFB13F/

Image: Unsplash

In Advice

Pre-wedding bridal skincare tips

January 17, 2020 No Comments

On your wedding day, you want to look and feel your best. However, getting here requires work that often starts months before your big day. Here are some tips to make sure you are looking and feeling your best come wedding day.

Develop a consistent skincare routine and STICK TO IT!

Hopefully you already have one in place, but it is important to have a skincare routine designed for your particular skin. Maybe you have oily skin, dry skin, or sensitive skin. Maybe you have discolouration, rosacea or fine lines. Regardless, there are many products created to cater for a multitude of skin types and concerns. Now, developing a skincare routine is not easy. It’s mainly just trial-and-error.

While Koreans are famed for their 12-step routines, many dermatologists recommend a simpler skincare routine with three key steps: cleanse, tone, moisturise. Another thing dermatologists agree on is that SPF is the most important skincare product everyone should be using. Sunscreen protects your skin from the harmful UV rays of the sun. Many skincare and makeup products contain SPF, which makes it that much easier and leaves you with no excuse not to use it.

Facials:

Treat your skin to a facial with your regular aesthetician every month in the lead up to your wedding. When meeting your aesthetician, highlight what you want to focus on with the facials. It’s also important to speak up about your skin type. If you’ve got sensitive skin, your aesthetician has to be very careful about the types of products they use, and it’s the same for dry and oily skin.

Importantly, make sure not to get a new facial the day before your wedding. Your skin might react weirdly and leave you with a nasty pimple on your big day. Leave yourself a couple of days for your skin to calm down and really reflect the benefits.

Exfoliate:

Get rid of those pesky dried skin cells with a weekly exfoliant that will leave your skin silky smooth. Exfoliants help your skin appear brighter and glowing, which is always a good thing. Be careful when choosing your exfoliant, as some can be too harsh on your skin.

Importantly, over-exfoliating can leave your skin dry, flaky and irritated, so best avoid using this product more than three times a week. Usage will change depending on the strength of your exfoliator.

Manage your stress

I know it’s hard, but this one’s important. With all the wedding planning and small moving parts to keep track of, your skin and body is likely to show your internal stress. You need to keep stress at bay so that it doesn’t show up in your skin through a breakout. A host of other conditions like exzema and psoriasis can be worsened through stress.

Consider sharing the load and delegating jobs to your bridal party to help out so that you don’t carry all the stress of event planning. If you have an event planner, that’s even better! It’s also a great idea to participate in some stress-relieving activities like yoga, painting or reading.

Feature image: Pexels

In Advice

Registry mistakes you might be making

January 13, 2020 No Comments

A wedding registry seems like one of the easiest tasks in preparation for a wedding. You go to a store, pick the items you think you need (or want) and have the store create a list with your name on it. It may, however, not be as simple as you think.

There are a few common mistakes that couples make when it comes to the registry. These slip-ups could have your guests criticising and will have you cringing! Ensure that you steer clear of any awkward situations by avoiding these common registry mistakes.

– Waiting too long to register

Once you get engaged, putting together a wedding registry should be on the top of your list of things to do! Ensure that you have this done within a month of your engagement. You’ll be receiving engagement gifts soon, and the registry will help people to get you a gift for the engagement too. Don’t worry about looking greedy, the registry is simply to help your guests, not to demand things from them.

– Including the registry on the wedding invitation

This could make it seem as though you’re demanding a gift. After all, it isn’t compulsory for guests to give gifts.

When you put the registry on the invitation it feels like you’re asking for a gift in exchange for entrance into the wedding. Many people will find it rude that you’ve added it.

Instead, you could direct people to the registry via your wedding website or the save the date.

– Only registering in one place

While registering at only one store is probably the easiest option for you, it probably will be inconvenient for your guests. Some guests will want to buy gifts at real stores instead of online and some may be too far away from the one physical store you’ve chosen.

Be sure to have one or two online stores and one or two physical stores with your registry. Limit the amount of stores to three or four. Too many stores could also be a bad idea, as this may make you look greedy or self-indulgent.

– Asking directly for cash

Here, it’s more about tact than anything else. These days it’s okay to ask for money if you do it in the right way. You shouldn’t directly say that you want money. However, you can indicate that you will be happy to receive contributions to a down payment on your new home or to your dream honeymoon.

The trick is to choose your words wisely and ensure that you’re showing people that their money will go to good use.

– Not varying the prices of gifts

Putting only expensive, dream items on your list may be a bit presumptuous. Remember that some people may not be within the means to buy you an expensive gift, and some simply may not want to. A colleague, for example, wouldn’t want to splurge on a wedding gift for you.

Similarly, don’t assume that nobody will buy you one of those dream items on your list. Add a few! Maybe a few people will come together and get one big gift, or maybe your siblings are so happy for you that they decide to go all out.

Add a good variety of gifts to the registry, with prices from very low to quite high.

– Not writing thank you notes

While this is not registry related, it is gift related and failing to send out thank you notes is a big no-no!

Keep track of who gives you what, to make the thank you note process easier. After the wedding, you have no more than three months to get your thank you notes sent out. Don’t put it off!

Also read: Wedding gifts for every budget

Feature image: Pexels

In Advice

Pros and cons of changing your name

January 8, 2020 No Comments

Historically, women were required by law to take their husband’s surname. This is because women had no independent legal identity – they needed to be linked to a man. At birth they would be given their fathers surname and when they were married, their surname would change to that of their spouse automatically.

As time passed and women contested the laws regarding their rights, the rules changed. Now, changing your name is completely optional. The number of women who prefer to retain their maiden name is fast-growing world-wide.

There is, however, a certain feeling of romance and permanence that comes with changing your name as you get married. And of course, there is nothing wrong with wanting to change it!

The decision can be difficult to make. It is a very personal decision; one that only you can make for yourself. But to assist you in making the decision, here is a list of pros and cons of changing your name.

Pros

– You will have the same surname as your kids

If you decide to have children, they will most likely be given their father’s surname as lineage is typically tracked through male family members. If you opt to keep your maiden name, you’ll be the only one in your family with a different surname. This may cause you to feel a bit isolated. There may also come a time where you have to prove that you are your child’s mother – this is less likely if you have the same surname.

– It feels like a formal beginning of a new chapter

As you start this new chapter of your life, a change may feel necessary. While there are certainly many changes that come with marriage such as your living space and your daily routine, the change of a name is the only one that is bound by law. Changing your name can feel like you’re solidifying the new chapter of your life.

– You will spend less time explaining yourself

If you don’t change your name, you’ll be inundated with questions from your older family members who expect you to change your name and follow tradition. Other people might assume you’re not married, and when they realise you’ll likely be asked to explain why you have a different surname to your partner. Your kids in their younger years might also struggle to understand why their parents have different surnames.

While it is easy to answer all of the questions above and while you don’t owe anybody an explanation for your decisions, changing your name allows you to avoid all the fuss.

– You will feel more connected to your partner

There is a sense of unity that comes with sharing a surname with your partner. It also makes it easier to do things on behalf of your partner, especially if the law is involved.

Cons

– Paperwork and admin

The effort you have to put in to legally change your name is enough to put anyone off. The documents are complex and lengthy. You have to remember, you’re not just changing your ID. You’re also changing your passport, drivers licence, insurance, bank cards, and your store accounts or memberships.

The government issued documents are sure to take a while to process. As we know, a trip to Home Affairs is a full-day standing-in-line experience.

– May affect your career

If you’re at a point in your life where you have built a solid professional identity, you may be giving that up by changing your name. Your professional acquaintances may have trouble finding you. People may not vouch for you and your outstanding work when asked about you as they may not know your name has changed and thus won’t know who they are being asked about.

– Separation from your family

You will no longer share a surname with your parents and siblings. This may cause you to feel distanced from them and from your roots. Your individual identity may also be affected as a result.

– You will struggle to access old legal documents

If you need to access legal documents or financial documents from years gone by, it will be much more difficult with a new surname.

– Could feel like you’re opposing your personal politics

If you’re anti-patriarchy and pro-feminism, you may consider the history of the name change off-putting. If you change your name, it could feel as though you’re giving in to the system.

Of course, there are other options than changing or keeping your name. You could hyphenate your old and new surname or even get creative by combining a part of your surname with your partners to create a new one that you can share.

If you’re struggling to make the decision, why not flip a coin? That’s exactly what this couple did.

Regardless of your choice, it is one you have to make for yourself. Any decision is the right decision if it feels true to you.

Image: Pexels

In Advice

How to pull off mismatched bridesmaid dresses

January 7, 2020 No Comments

Gone are the days of the matchy-matchy bridesmaids. Modern brides are often turning towards unique gowns tailored to fit their individual bridesmaids.

Just like how you need to find your dream wedding dress, your bridesmaids need to find their perfect dress. What suits one might not suit the other, and it’s important to consider how your bridesmaids look and feel on the big day. Going with mismatched bridesmaids dresses shows you care about your bridesmaids and want them to feel as confident as possible.

However, mismatched bridesmaid dresses present a new challenge as you run the risk of your bridal party appearing disjointed if not done right. Here are some tips to pull this trend off.

Same fabric and colour, different styles

One option is to go with dresses in the same fabric and colour but different styles. This way, your bridesmaids still look like your bridesmaids but they get to dress to complement their best assets. Maybe one bridesmaid has beautiful shoulders and wants to show them off but another feels a little insecure about her arms. Playing to each bridesmaid’s strength is the best way to keep everyone happy while still staying on theme.

Importantly, you will have to make sure the fabric and colour is flattering on all your bridesmaids. Take your time to go through fabric swatches and have your bridesmaids on hand to compare the colour with their skintone. We love how the richness of these chocolate brown dresses work so well against the bridesmaids skin.

Another tip is to not have too many different features. These bridesmaids all have different necklines but each dress has a straight cut design.

https://www.instagram.com/p/B3P1s2tgtsz/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

Same dress, different colours

If you have a specific vision in mind, another option is to have your bridesmaids wear the same dress but in different colours. The colours you choose will then fit in with the wedding colour scheme. This gives you enough point of difference but still looks cohesive.

You should ideally have no more than three colour variations to avoid the final look being too busy. Make sure that the colours you choose work well with each other, and discuss with your bridesmaids who will wear what colour to make sure that everyone is happy.

Pro tip: swatches can look very different in a full dress. Don’t rely on swatches, compare the colours using full-size sample gowns to make sure there are no surprises come your first fitting.

https://www.instagram.com/p/B7Ap8tZBQ9X/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

Different colours, cuts and fabric

Finally, you could just go all out and have completely different bridesmaids dresses altogether. Each bridesmaid can then decide the cut, colour and length they prefer. This option gives your bridesmaids the most freedom in choosing their look, which can be a good thing and a bad thing.

You should guide your bridesmaids in the direction you want to avoid them going too far out of your vision. A great idea is to create a mood board for your bridesmaids to really understand the look and feel you’re striving for. This way, it makes it easier for your bridesmaids to stay on theme.

To avoid looking disjointed, the dresses should all have a similar style which will generally go with the wedding theme. In the example below, these bridesmaids all have their own unique look but each dress has a distinctly boho style to it. With flowing cuts and lace/embroidery detail on every dress, there is still uniformity in their differences.

https://www.instagram.com/p/Bu_kAFZD4mi/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

Feature image: Unsplash

In Advice

Wedding guest etiquette

January 3, 2020 No Comments

Wedding season is exciting! Maybe a dear friend is tying the knot or a close family member is planning on saying “I do”. Perhaps a colleague or neighbour has invited you to their nuptials. These are all great opportunities to celebrate the people in your life, and are definitely events to look forward to. Most people agree that weddings are a lot of fun. However, you may be a bit worried about what is expected of you as a wedding guest.

Sure, even the most seasoned wedding guest can mistakenly break the rules every now and then. But, the last thing you want is to embarrass yourself in front of all the other guests or be an inconvenience. If you want to ensure that your wedding-attendance-reputation is top quality and that you’re the best wedding guest you can be, then follow these simple tips.

– RSVP as soon as you can
Whether or not you’re planning on attending, you should RSVP as soon as you can. If you don’t, it’ll be a huge inconvenience to the couple, especially if you still show up to the wedding. Often, the couple needs to communicate a final head-count to vendors such as caterers. While you may think putting off the RSVP is minor, you could be unnecessarily adding to the couples wedding stress. Don’t do it!

– Don’t bring a guest if you weren’t given a plus one
If the wedding invite doesn’t clearly state that you can bring a guest, then don’t. It’s also probably a good idea not to assume that you can bring your kids either. If the invite doesn’t say anything, then find out first.

Weddings are expensive. If you didn’t get a plus one, then the couple wasn’t planning on catering for your plus one. Additionally, most venues have a maximum capacity. It will be mighty awkward if you bring a guest and there is no seat for them.

We know it can be uncomfortable to attend a wedding alone, but it’s better than causing an inconvenience on the couple’s special day.

– Dress appropriately
Take the season and the time of day into account, then dress appropriately for those factors. Be sure to check if there are any dress code specifications on the invitation. If there are, then follow them. Do not take any artistic liberty.

Additionally, avoid wearing white at all costs. Wearing white is considered to be extremely rude – you’ll be wearing the bride’s colour on her special day.

– Arrive on time
This is not the time to arrive fashionably late. If you arrive late you may disrupt the ceremony or proceedings. You’ll be considered rude and inconsiderate.

– Put your phone on silent
This is another way you may mistakenly disrupt the ceremony. If you get some notifications or a phone call during the ceremony, it is quite distracting. The attention should be on the couple, do not take it away from them.

In fact, you should try to keep texting and social media to a minimum during the wedding, lest you come across as uninterested or bored.

– Don’t abuse the open bar
You don’t need to take full advantage of the free drinks. A wedding is a classy event, so behave as such. A story about you passing out at the wedding is sure to get you uninvited from future weddings very quickly.

– Mingle with the other guests
If you’re at a table with strangers, be sure to introduce yourself and make some conversation. When it’s appropriate, get up and talk to other people too. This simply makes you a pleasant guest to have in attendance. You should, however, avoid sitting in a different seat because you know people at a table that isn’t the one you were assigned. You’ll be messing with months’ worth of planning.

– Don’t compare the wedding to others you’ve attended
It may seem as though you’re being judgemental or criticizing the wedding. The couple has spent a great amount of time planning this, and to them it’s perfect. Keep your opinions to yourself. Nobody wants to be seated next to a Negative Nancy.

– Unless you’re the actual photographer, keep the pic snapping to a minimum
Hovering around the couple all day to take pictures can be quite annoying. It can also be quite distracting. Refrain from this. One or two pictures are fine, but don’t over-do it.

Another thing that you should remember is to avoid using your flash. Your flash may ruin the official photographer’s photos or simply just distract the couple and other guests.

– Don’t leave early
Unless it is really necessary, it’s best not to leave early. Wait at least until the cake is cut. It’s simply good manners. You wouldn’t want to make the couple feel bad on their special day, would you?

Image: Unsplash

In Advice

Should you invite kids to your wedding?

December 19, 2019 No Comments

One of the most controversial guest-list decisions you’ll make is whether or not you’re inviting kids to your wedding. On the one hand, the decision against inviting kids could cause some tension between you and your loved ones. On the other, a wedding without kids is likely to be much easier.

There are many things to be taken into consideration when making this decision. From guest expectations to venue capacity.

Ultimately, the decision is yours and you should do what feels right for you and your partner.

To help you wrap your head around making this decision, here are some pros and cons of inviting kids to your wedding.

Pros of inviting kids:

– Your guests with kids won’t have an issue attending

It is common for guests to complain about a child-free wedding because they don’t have anywhere to leave their kids. Sometimes, finding a good baby-sitter can be tough, especially if the child’s grandparents are also attending the wedding. If you’re inviting guests from out of town, they won’t be familiar with any sitters in the area. Most people won’t leave their kids behind if they’re travelling either.

By allowing kids at your wedding, you ensure that all your friends and family with kids are able to be in attendance.

– They add to the atmosphere

Inviting kids to your wedding brings a playfulness that you likely wouldn’t get from your adult guests. Having children run around and giggle with joy really does add an extra touch of happiness to the special day.

– There will be no tension

If you decide on having a wedding-wide ban on kids, you have to be prepared for some tension. Many people will take offense to the decision. This can be totally avoided if you allow parents to bring their kids along.

– Your nieces and nephews can be part of the wedding

While kids may not always be your cup of tea, we’re sure you’re very fond of your little nieces and nephews. You may even want them to be a part of the bridal party. If your wedding doesn’t accommodate kids, this is something you’ll have to give up.

Cons of inviting kids:

– Kids are unpredictable

Kids are known for their unpredictability. They could start screaming and crying and having a full-blown temper tantrum at any moment. Additionally, they get a bit fidgety if they’re sitting still for too long. They may start running around and acting uncontrollably if they get bored. If you’d prefer to avoid the risk of having your “I do’s” interrupted, then an adults-only affair is probably better for you.

– You will have to spend more money

Venue size and catering need to be taken into account. They may be little but kids still require seats and food. If your budget is tight, you may want to ensure that your adult guests are catered for first and then decide if you can afford to invite kids.

– You’ll have to keep them busy

Entertainment for kids and entertainment for adults are two completely different things. You will have to ensure that you have a way to keep kids busy, because for them a wedding is a very long event.

Image: Unsplash

In Advice

How to find the perfect red lipstick for you

December 12, 2019 No Comments

A bold red lip makes you feel powerful. We know! There’s nothing like a good red lipstick. Dressed up or dressed down, red lipstick can be paired with almost anything, making it the go-to for many.

The only problem: finding the perfect red lipstick is no small task. Your skin tone is a major determinant in which red you should go for. That’s why the red lip that your friend wears (the one you love to death) doesn’t have the same effect on your lips.

We’re of the opinion that your handbag should always have a red lipstick inside it. So, here is a quick and easy guide to finding the perfect one for you.

For a fair complexion

Go for a blue-based or pink-based red lipstick. The cool tones will contrast well with your fair complexion because of its pink-based undertone.

Our pick: Maybelline Made For All Lipstick by Color Sensational in Red-For-Me R139.95

For a medium complexion

Opt for an orange-based red. This will bring a brightening look to your skin tone and remove any pallidness.

Our pick: M A C Matte Lipstick in Lady Danger R260

For an olive complexion

Look for a brick or rust tinted red. You could also go for a coral or orange base. An olive complexion carries a yellow-green undertone. Earthy toned lipsticks will work effortlessly with your skin.

Our pick: NYX Butter Lipstick in Mary Janes R129.95

For a dark complexion

A darker complexion allows for a wider variety of reds. If you want a bold look, opt for a deep, true red. If you want a more natural look, go for blue-based reds.

Our pick: M A C Retro Matte Lipstick in Ruby Woo R260

Image: Unsplash

In Advice

How to handle the heat at summer weddings

December 11, 2019 No Comments

Wedding season is upon us and unfortunately so is the scorching summer. Sweat drenched outfits and melting makeup are not ideal on your wedding day. While you can’t get rid of the sun, there are a number of ways you can make the day more manageable for you and your guests.

Here are some key tips to beat the heat this wedding season:

Pack an emergency kit

Sweat is inevitable, but that doesn’t mean you have to live with it. Pack an emergency kit filled with products designed to keep you looking fresh throughout the day. In your kit, make sure to include deodorant, perfume, baby wipes, powder to mattify your makeup and extra makeup for touch-ups.

Avoid too much alcohol

The heat and alcohol are not friends. Consuming alcohol while sitting under the beating sun can leave you feeling drunk way sooner that you expected. Your body will struggle to regulate its internal temperature, putting you at a higher risk of heat stroke. Alcohol is also a diuretic, meaning you will urinate more frequently and thus lose more body fluid. This can led to dehydration if you’re not careful. Stay safe and sip on some refreshing H2O for every alcoholic drink you consume.

Cool favours

If you’re planning on having an outdoor summer wedding, keep your guests in mind with some cooling favours. Whether they are made of paper, wood or miniature motorised ones, a handheld fan will do wonders to create a slight breeze. You could also offer sunglasses or parasols in your wedding theme. Make sure to monogram them with a sweet message to make these favours extra memorable.

SPF!!

We know, we know. We sound like a mom telling their 5-year-old to lather up with some sunscreen before heading out to the beach. However naggy it may seem, we will always campaign for the use of SPF because it is crucial to protecting your skin from the suns harmful rays, especially if you’ll be outdoors. Make sure to use a good facial SPF and lotion up with a body sunscreen. Most dermatologists recommend using a SPF 15 or SPF 30 sunscreen.

Wear lighter fabrics:

It might not be your biggest concern, but the fabric of your wedding attire will have a large effect on your day. When choosing your wedding dress/suit, make sure to go for lighter, more breathable fabrics that won’t trap in the heat. Think linen, chiffon, crepe, tulle and organza. Fabrics you will definitely want to steer clear from include velvet, leather and silk.

Image: Pexels

Do’s And Don’ts