Pros and cons of writing your own wedding vows

Pros and cons of writing your own wedding vows

So your wedding day planning is coming together. You’ve got your vendors sorted out and your decor and attire is turning out perfectly. Now, you’re focusing on the finer details. Included in these details are the wedding vows.

Many couples find pleasure in writing their own wedding vows. They believe it’s more special, more personal, and a way to fully express what their partner means to them. For others, writing wedding vows is a nightmare. You’re concerned about what other people will think, if you’ll bore your guests, if you’ll speak for too long, the list of worries are endless.

If you’re still uncertain about which way you’ll go, perhaps considering the pros and cons of both will help you make your final decision.


– Your guests will be interested 

The traditional wedding vows have been heard a million times before. Since you will be presenting some fresh material, your guest are likely to listen more intently and hang on your every word.

– The vows will be more personal 

If you write your own wedding vows, they’ll come from your heart, from your experiences with your partner, and they’ll be based on your life together thus far. You could also talk about your hopes for the future, and paint a picture that the traditional wedding vows don’t allow.

– You can add anecdotes to make it more special 

This is probably the best part about writing your own wedding vows. You’re able to tell stories. These personal anecdotes add a uniqueness to your vows, as no couple has the same stories as you.


– Public speaking is already difficult as it is 

It’s likely you’ll be nervous on the day. You’ll stand in front of all your friends and family, on one of the biggest days of your life, and you’ll have to remember all those things you wrote down. It’s tougher than it looks!

But if you stick with the traditional wedding vows, theres no chance of you stumbling on your words, forgetting what you wrote or losing your place on the page in front of you.

– There is quite a bit of stress that comes with it 

While writing you own wedding vows is a very special task to take on, it’s also quite stressful. You want to say all the right things, keep you audience interested, keep it short, be articulate, and the list goes on and on. This can be a lot of pressure.

If it feels too much, opt for the traditional wedding vows.

– You and your partner may have different styles 

You and your partner may have vert different styles, and thus your vows may come across as a bit incompatible. Maybe you write a two page long set of vows, and your partner only writes a paragraph. This could be a bit awkward.

Image: Pixabay 

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