We’ve all heard of or experienced getting cold feet before big, life-changing events, and it’s a relatively common occurrence when it comes to a few days before your wedding. You may feel that in your heart you are destined to be with your significant other, but still have those fears of taking the step towards marriage.

And it’s completely normal!

Pre-wedding stress after months of planning and organising is no cause for concern. You’re worried about things going wrong on the day, how you’ll look and also taking the steps to legally wed your partner – it can all be a bit overwhelming.

If you’re experiencing cold feet, here are a few tips to help you ease the stress.

1. GIRL TIME

Spend the night with your bridesmaids or some close girlfriends watching movies and pampering each other to take your mind off of any pre-wedding jitters.

2. RELAX

Enjoy a relaxing massage scheduled at your favourite spa for later in the evening the day before your wedding to help you unwind and sleep more easily.

3. MEMORIES

Look back at some old photographs of you and your partner to remember all the incredible times you have spent together, and all the amazing memories you have yet to make.

4. COMMUNICATE

You may not be spending the night with your future husband or wife, but if you really feel you need to, give them a call or message them to let them know how you’re feeling. They are probably feeling the same and you can talk it through with each other.

5. MEDITATE

If it works for you, put on some ocean songs or rainfall sounds and sit or lie down in a comfortable position while practising breathing exercises to clear your mind.

Image: Unsplashed

Whether you’re someone who likes to plan things down to the last detail or you just like to let things flow naturally, you should definitely try to write your own wedding vows. It will be so worth it!

We all wish it could be like the movies, where the bride or groom throws away the paper with all the notes they made and speak beautifully from their hearts, but it’s not that easy when it comes down to standing at the altar with all your family and friends watching.

So why not try a few of these tips in preparation for the big day and let your dream partner know exactly how you feel.

1. Jot down words describing how your significant other makes you feel.
2. Write down your favourite memory with your S/O, and tie it into how you knew you wanted to be together forever.
3. Think about all the qualities your partner has that you absolutely love, and write those down too.
4. Write down any promises you want to make to your S/O throughout the rest of your lives, but try to avoid cliches and keep things realistic.
5. Once you’ve gathered enough notes on your partner and your relationship, you can write your vows in a set format, or try to style it so that you are telling a story.
6. If you and your S/O are planning your vows together, try to set a tone and structure, but don’t worry about being formal. You want your feelings for each other to sound natural and not rehearsed.
7. While you may have endless amounts to say to your partner, you should try to keep it short and highlight the most important things you want to say to them.
8. Your vows are basically a public declaration of your love and promises to your S/O, so if you are struggling to find a way to structure your vows you can look for inspiration online, or even from movies (as long as it’s not too cheesy, unless you like that kinda thing).
9. Once you think you have written your vows the way you wish to say them (this can take you a number of tries), make a clean copy and practice them out loud.
10. If you want advice, and you aren’t worried about your partner knowing what you’ll say, you can even practice your vows with your partner to see if it works.

Image: @vsdartistry // Instagram

Picture this. It’s your big day in a few months time and you feel completely torn between whether you want to stick to tradition or scrap it all and reinvent a whole new wedding style. Not to worry, we’re breaking down the standard options to provide alternatives to wedding traditions to leave behind and give a variety of options and creative ways to celebrate with your loved ones.

THE WHITE DRESS

While regarded as a symbol of purity, the traditional white wedding dress only became popular after Queen Victoria opposed the norm by wearing a white lace and satin gown for her wedding with Prince Albert in 1840. It is still a popular option for many brides today, but definitely has room for change. If you want to be daring and different, opt for colours like red, black or gold. Pastels of blue, pink, cream and grey have also become stunning options that break tradition.

Image: @gracephilipsbridal

THE BOUQUET

Some believe that bridal bouquets were used to mask the stench of the brides, who only showered once or twice a year before running water was a norm. But brides would also carry herbs and spices to protect themselves from evil spirits. While it may seem odd to walk down the aisle empty-handed, there are plenty alternatives to holding a bunch of flowers. Make a glamorous entrance carrying a matching clutch purse, or be unique with themed balloons or coloured ribbon. Having an outdoor wedding? Carry a stunning custom umbrella to match your dress.

Image: @philipjamesphotography

GIVEN AWAY

A standard norm for weddings is for the bride to be walked down the aisle by her father to be ‘given away’ to her future husband. In older times, this was a symbol of transferring ownership of the bride from her current family to her new family. While still a common practice, modern times have seen brides walk down the aisle alone, with both parents, or a close loved one.

Image: @event.life.entertainment

BRIDESMAIDS

Way back in the day, bridesmaids would dress similarly to the bride to confuse evil spirits and anyone trying to harm the bride. Nowadays, they are a group of women hand-picked by the bride-to-be to offer support and perform certain bridal duties. Even if you aren’t too keen on this tradition, it’s a great idea to have a group of close friends by your side to offer support assistance in planning your big day, and their outfits can be unique too!

Image: @ranch_505

BOUQUET & GARTER TOSS

This interesting tradition began (supposedly) as a way to distract the wedding guests while the happy couple engaged in the consummation of their marriage. Strange, right? Nowadays the throwing of the bouquet and garter are meant to bring luck and love to whoever catches them. While this can be a fun treat, it can also be slightly embarrassing for all the singletons taking part. Wedding games that include everyone are fun and creative. Have the bride and groom participate in a ‘How Much Do You Know About Your S/O’ for some light-hearted entertainment during the evening.

Image: @sofiakatherinephotography

Traditions are always changing, as do their meanings in our lives. Whether you choose to follow tradition or not, it shouldn’t be an issue for your big day. Whatever a practice means to you, it should only be a part of your day because you want it to be. Don’t feel pressured to follow the norms if you don’t agree with them or value them in your own life. Your wedding day is all about you and the celebration of love!

Header image: @lovemydress
Photography: instagram.com

Love may not cost a thing – but a wedding usually does! Take the financial sting out of your big day with our 5 clever ways to cut costs.

By Jessica Baxter

1. GO OFF PEAK

Venues and service providers are usually more expensive in peak wedding season, so consider an off-peak wedding to cut costs. Alternatively, if you’ve always dreamt of a summer soirée, make it a mid-week affair, which may bring down the price substantially.

2. FOOD FOR THOUGHT

Catering can eat into your budget. Do your research on the cost of a buffet versus a plated meal. Another way to trim the fat is to limit the choices on the menu.

3. SCALE DOWN THE PHOTO SHOOT

Photographers tend to charge by the hour, so ask a friend or bridesmaid to take photos of you getting ready and hire the professional for the main event only.

4. THE DRESS 

If you’ve had your eye on a designer gown that costs more than your car, consider hiring a dress or buying one on sale. You can also cast your net wider and browse regular stores for evening dresses.

5. BUDGET BLOOMS

Do you have a friend or neighbour with a beautiful garden? Ask them what’s in season when you get married and you may be able to forage flowers and foliage from their garden to use in your table arrangements. If you’re using a florist, specify seasonal flowers to keep the price down.

FIVE EXTRA WAYS TO STRETCH YOUR RANDS EVEN FURTHER

1. Keep the numbers small. Invite only close family and friends – the ones you know will be celebrating your 10-year wedding anniversary with you.
2. Choose e-vites instead of regular invitations – no postage, no printing costs.
3. Cut the entourage. Instead of having a bevvy of bridesmaids, choose one or two and ask other close friends to be involved by doing a reading or handing out the order of service.
4. Limit the bar. Offer only beer, cider and wine instead of a full bar service.
5. Choose a DJ instead of a band and ask them to play at both the ceremony and reception to get the most bang for your buck. 

If you’re not one for lavish affairs, the thought of escaping to a far-off land to secretly tie the knot with your Prince Charming, sounds like an utterly surreal and thrilling adventure. However, eloping isn’t just about running off into the sunset without a care in the world. There are a few factors to consider and we’ve sussed out all of them to help you decide if this is really the route you and your man want to take.

1 The legal schtick

As a South African couple looking to get married abroad, you need to find out whether your country of choice allows South Africans, if any foreigners at all, to wed on their turf. In certain cases, you may need to have physical tests (such as a blood test) done or fill in specialised forms. The embassy of the country you want to get hitched in will be able to tell you the exact requirements for your nuptials.

Regardless of where you take the plunge, a certain matrimonial property regime will govern your marriage. Read more about South Africa’s regimes here. The country’s common law stipulates that the regime in the husband’s country of permanent residence, also called a domicile, at the time of marriage, will apply. The default regime in South Africa is ‘in community of property’. So, if your groom permanently lives in Port Elizabeth, you’ll be married in community of property. If you prefer to be married out of community of property, you need to sign an antenuptial contract in South Africa before you jet off.

To register your marriage when you get back home, you won’t have to pay a fee. Nevertheless, you’ll need to write a letter to the Department of Home Affairs containing your contact details, including your address, mobile numbers and email addresses. The Department also requires a certified copy of your passport, ID or birth certificate and a copy of your foreign marriage certificate. If the certificate is not in English, it must be submitted with an English translation by a sworn translator.

2 Money matters

A major plus of eloping is that you spare yourself a substantial amount of dough. Without a group of guests attending, you’ll place drastically less strain on your bank account because of the reduced cost of your venue, catering and transport, amongst other items.

Even so, that doesn’t mean there are no expenses involved. No matter where you decide to tie the knot, you will require a roof over your head. There are plenty of wedding venues that offer elopement packages that include lodging, a space to hold your ceremony and a tasteful meal at one of their eateries. If you’re lucky, they may even throw in a wedding cake and bottle of bubbly!

To bask in that wedding day feeling, treat yourself to a gorgeous gown, even if it’s not the usual wedding fare, and have your hair and makeup done. Your man deserves to be decked out in a dashing suit too, and you can even indulge in some pre-wedding couples’ pampering at a spa.

Regardless of who’ll be – or not be – at your ceremony, you’ll want the day to be etched in your memory forever, so don’t forget to hire a photographer. Chat to them about possibly reducing their rates as there’ll be less activity to document.

If you really want to pull out all the stops to make your wedding as opulent as possible – minus the guest list drama, of course – consider a ‘luxury elopement’. This typically entails having exquisite decor, an elaborate wedding dress and a videographer, in addition to anything else that may be on your dream wedding wishlist.

3 Elopement etiquette

Some of your family and friends may suffer bruised egos when they discover that your nuptials didn’t include them. It’s best to let them know about your plans to elope before or immediately after your marriage has been made official. When it comes to announcing your nuptials to the rest of the world (i.e. your friends, colleagues and everyone on Facebook), first make a list of the people you’re most close to then give them a call to share the good news before updating your ‘Relationship Status’ on social media. If your extended family and friends would still like to celebrate with you, why not invite them over for a small celebratory gathering?

Keep in mind that since you’ll be eloping, it would be unfair to ask family and friends to purchase a gift. Also, consider your relationship with certain family members and friends who may want to be witness to your big day, and the cultural or religious traditions that they may want you to honour.

Photography freestocks.org, Zivile & Arunas /Unsplash, Pixabay

Weddings are expensive. We don’t really need to say it, but if you were ever unsure, then we’ll happily remind you. That being said, these ideas will hopefully help make that dent in your bank account a little less severe.

1 Send an email

Many cost-effective wedding ideas can also be eco-friendly, including the very first task on your list. Emailing your invites doesn’t only save heaps of paper; it saves you spending money on fancy stationery. Of course, you might want a pretty design on your invites, and a professional designer would be your best bet. While this will cost a little extra, by foregoing printing and mailing charges, you’re bound to save a pretty penny or two.

2 Pick the right venue

Always dreamt of a farm wedding or a ceremony on a secluded beach? Feel like booking out an entire hotel for the weekend? Think again, kiddo! Your venue may be important but it’s not worth emptying your entire life savings for. Draw up a list of places where you’d like to get hitched then find out which ones can accommodate the number of guests you intend to invite as well as the costs involved (this includes ceremony and reception areas, catering, accommodation and the use of any other facilities in offer). You can then make your final decision based on what you can afford. Alternatively, draw some inspiration from Father of the Bride and get married at home though you’ll need to check with mum and dad first.

3 Be selective with your guest list

This is a tricky one. You don’t want to offend any of your friends or loved ones but limiting the number of guests at your wedding is, among many things, pretty cost-effective. It means less accommodation and catering costs as well as a smaller venue for the big day (and we know of a few). It also means less spending on other, smaller aspects of the wedding such as invitations (if you’ve decided against email), wedding favours and stationery. In addition, limiting the number people at your wedding increases your chances of saying a quick ‘hello’ to everyone during the reception.

4 Try a second-hand dress

The first line of the old rhyme should be changed to ‘Something old instead of new’. And ‘something borrowed’ is the way to go as well. Don’t blow a huge chunk of money on a customised dress you’re only going to wear once. Seek out a well-made stylish dress at a sale or second-hand store, or hire one instead. You may come across a stunning vintage garment that sets the tone for your wedding and leaves you looking and feeling like a star from a bygone era. You can also have your bridesmaids save a few pennies by going this route.

5 Use natural, recyclable and DIY décor

Another environmentally friendly idea that’s also cost-effective is to use natural and recyclable materials as wedding decorations. Think glass bottles, tin cans for flowers and candles, and objects such as stones or pinecones as napkin weights. You can also make your own decorations from a variety of materials, such as these.

Want more info on handling the finances for your big day? We’ve got you covered! 

Photography Archives, pexels.com, unsplash.com, pixabay.com

From beach wedding to elegant affair, the plethora of themes brides choose for their big day is often mind-boggling. Here, we break down looks for you – and your man – for the six most common wedding themes.

1 Black Tie Do

When the invitation reads ‘Dress Code: Black Tie’, you know it’s time to amp up the glam factor. A satin mermaid gown in a regal shade such as deep blue, teamed with strings of pearls, is an effortlessly elegant option. Complete the look with a sleek updo and a classic, red lip. Make sure your beau looks the part too by having him follow in James Bond’s footsteps and donning a tuxedo. For a distinctive touch, he could wear a white jacket instead, or a white shirt with a black stripe along the side of the buttoned placket.

2 Mexican Fiesta

To the Mexicans, life is one big party overflowing with pops of vivid hues and vibrant patterns. Show your zest for life in a maxi dress covered in an intricate floral print. A flowy dress brings a hint of feminine flair yet is comfy enough to last you throughout a long night of dancing. Who says guys need to stick to a blazer in a neutral colour? A jewel-toned one is a fun alternative that can be accessorised with a uniquely textured hat. If he prefers a blazer in a subdued shade, he may jazz it up with a patterned scarf.

3 Country Fete

When venturing out to a beautiful farm area, you can forego the ball gown in favour of an understated, chiffon cocktail dress. Pair it with a cute top sporting cut-out shapes and add a simple pendant necklace to complement the top’s details. You’ll probably be walking through grass or on gravel roads, so flat shoes such as brogues are best. Men will look spiffy in a plaid or tweed waistcoat that can be dressed down with a casual sweater worn underneath it. A beret, much like those worn by English countryside natives, will round off the ensemble.

4 Indian Jamboree

As stunning as saris may be, most of us don’t have the knack to seamlessly drape one of them around our bodies. Try a churidar instead, which is essentially a dress-like top worn over skinny pants. Like the Mexicans, Indians are fond of embracing bright shades and loads of embellishments – even in menswear! Your S.O can clothe himself like an Eastern prince in a kurta, a two-piece outfit with a fairly long jacket and pants, which can often be just as ornate as any women’s look.

5 Beach Soirée

The wind in your hair and sand between your toes creates a relaxed vibe that can be reflected in what you wear. A lightweight kaftan allows for practicality without compromising on style. If you’d like to add some sparkle, a pair of chandelier earrings will do the trick – not to mention turn a few heads. A beach wedding is pretty much the only kind of nuptial affair where it’s fitting for the boys to whip out a pair of shorts. Skip the boardies though and opt for a tailored pair coupled with a button-down shirt.

6 Bohemian Festivity

Whimsical and free-spirited, a bohemian celebration gives you the chance take more risks with fashion. Try layering a sheer or crocheted slip over an opaque lace-trimmed frock, then dress it up with lipstick in a bold shade and loose waves. If your guy is into fashion, he’ll jump at the chance to don a pair of suspenders with his chinos. Help him pick out one with stripes in different colours to bring out his inner child.

Photography Mariya Georgieva, Rachael Crowe, Saksham Gangwar, Jake Young/Unsplash, Pixabay, Pexels, Courtesy images

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The wizard will match your wedding to the most suitable, available suppliers. Login and use the comprehensive wedding planning tools to start creating your own dream wedding day. It’s a simple, fun solution to wedding planning.

Sign up and register for My Wedding Wizard here. Visit the website at myweddingwizard.co.za or contact 021 556 3257. 

Photographs Courtesy