• Whether you want animals as a backdrop for your wedding photos or using them for your grand entrance, live creatures aren’t for your wedding decoration. It may seem ‘stunning’ or produce that extra ‘wow’ factor, but at the end of the day, it’s cruel and not fair on the animals.

    Recently, a bride thought it would be a great idea to use goldfish in her centerpieces. She thought it would be a lovely idea to have a pair of goldfish in a bowl on each table, which symbolised her nuptials. The bride expected guests to take the goldfish home, as a ‘sort of’ wedding favour.

    Sounds foolproof right? Wrong.

    The maid of honour tried her best to discourage the bride from this idea, but sadly, she would not budge.  As hard as it may seem, not everyone wants to go home with an unexpected new pet. As the wedding reception commenced, she was left with having to keep an eye on the fish centerpieces. A few goldfish checked out a little early, but the newly married couple had ‘spares in the back’.

    By the end of the night, as the maid of honour predicted, guests left without their special ‘wedding favours’. The maid of honour was saddled with 100 goldfish. She rushed to the pet shop to get a bigger tank but many had died by the time she got home.

    In the end, only one out of the 100 goldfish survived. The fish named Sun lived for five years, a duration longer than her friendship with the bride and even longer than the marriage.

    The use of animals as wedding props doesn’t end there. Elephants have been used in wedding ceremonies for decades. These majestic creatures are kept captive, and live in fear of being forced into submission by abuse. The elephants are used to make an entrance or exit by the couple, for the wedding photoshoot and sometimes just as decoration.

    Taking them out of their natural habitat and subjecting them to the needs and desires of your wedding day is not okay.

    Picture: Pixabay

    Counselling is an imperative part of getting married. Couples can get swept away in the planning of a wedding, losing sight of the reasons why they are getting married. Speaking to a counsellor is essential for a couple as it will assist in mediating and fine-tuning the individual needs of each person’s expectations of marriage.
    Helen Searra, Cape Town-based life coach, says it is imperative to start off such a huge commitment on a positive note.

    “By getting a professional involved, it will allow both parties to be heard, without interruption, so that clear communication can be made. It offers a safe environment for couples to access their emotions and concerns thereby addressing issues that may otherwise lay dormant for years,” said Searra.

    Her other advice is: Marriage is about being real and counseling allows you to get real with each other, without losing your identity while you are in the “contracting” stage of your relationship.
    “When we meet our life partner we not only bring 2 people into the contract, we bring our families, friends, childhoods, different belief systems, cultures and life experiences. Investing in emotional support in building the best foundations for your relationship from the beginning  is  vitally important.”
    With the help of a counsellor, there is no worry to small or obstacle too big for a couple to overcome before getting married.
    Helen Searra is a Cape Town-based life coach. She has been practicing for 10 years in her field. She offers individual counseling sessions and couples counseling both in person or remotely over Skype. She offers package deals of either 4, 6 or 8 sessions. To enquire for a rates card, contact Helen on [email protected]

    Image: Pexels

    Corey Newman often watched his girlfriend, Marlowe Epstein, do the Washington Post crossword puzzle, so he worked with the Post’s crossword creator to write a puzzle with answers related to Epstein. The clue for 51 across was “Words with a certain ring to them,” and the answer was “Will You Marry Me.” The puzzle was published in the paper, and an unsuspecting Epstein completed it with the help of Newman. Slide 3: Coffee Cup Canadian coffee chain Tim Hortons asks customers to “roll up the rims” of the cups to see if they won a prize. So Jeff Chapman snuck a tiny note that read “Will you marry me?” under the rim of his cup and gave it to girlfriend Jaimie Baisley to unroll.

    You’ve  heard about the 4 C’s in diamonds, especially when choosing an engagement ring, but what do they actually mean?

    The 4 C’s – cut, colour, clarity and carat – refer to the standards by which  the quality of diamonds are assessed and allows one to compare diamonds.

    Cut

    The cut is important for the diamond’s overall beauty, as it determines how well the diamond unleashes light. This is not to be confused with the shape of the diamond. Cut refers to the diamond’s light performance (in layman’s terms, how much it sparkles). The cut will determine how the stone refracts and reflects light. A perfect stone (balanced and symmetrical) will be cut in such a way that the light that enters it will only reflect out the top of the stone, therefore making it very sparkly. A diamond that is cut too shallow or too deep will cause the light to leak out of the sides or bottom of the stone which causes a loss of shine. The sparkle of a well cut diamond can make it appear larger and you can therefore opt for a smaller carat weight. Who knew, right?!

    Colour

    Strangely enough, this actually refers to the lack of colour found in a diamond. The less colour, the more rate it is. Diamonds are graded on a scale of D-Z; with D (or white diamonds) being completely colourless. D-F are considered colourless and are therefore the most expensive. G-I are near colourless and slightly less expensive while J-Z have noticeable colour in the stone. Only diamond experts can actually tell the difference in anything higher than a G grading, so if budget is a consideration but you still want a white-looking diamond, a G or H grade diamond will be perfectly fine.

    Clarity

    Measures the imperfections found in the diamond in terms of number, size and position on a scale that ranges from imperfect to flawless. Internal imperfections are referred to as inclusions and external as blemishes. Clarity is often considered the least important of the 4 C’s due to the fact that the imperfections are often microscopic and depending on the location of the inclusions found in the stone, they can be hidden with the right ring setting.

    Carat

    Refers to the weight of the diamond, not the size. Two different shaped diamonds can have the same carat weight but appear slightly different in size. With a larger carat weight, the colour becomes more visible and therefore needs to be taken into consideration.

    Once you understand the 4 C’s, you will need to think about which one is the most important to you when choosing your ring.