• Once upon a time, saying “I do” in your early twenties felt like a given. Today? Not so much. South Africans are rewriting the rules of romance, choosing to marry later, more intentionally, and often with a clearer sense of self.

    ALSO SEE: The latest marriage statistics in South Africa

    The latest marriage statistics in South Africa

    Feature image: Pexels

    Originally posted in 2019.

    Creativity is always encouraged and being inventive is cool. But this guy might have just taken it too far. A Japanese man collected his fingernail clippings for a year, then ground it to a powder and baked it to create a “stone” for an engagement ring. The end result is a pitch black, rock hard stone. If you didn’t know, you would probably never guess that’s it’s made from human nails.

    He created the silver band himself too, baking and filing everything from scratch, and filming the whole painstaking process. The video went viral and has over 11 million views. The internet is not quite sure how to respond, ranging from disgusted to amazed!

    We’re not sure if he actually proposed to someone with it yet, but we do think he would be a very hands-on husband.

    Picture: Youtube:/ kiwami Japan

     

    Most women know what style of wedding dress they want. But have you considered the practicalities of finding your dream frock that have nothing to do with how it looks? Renowned local dress designer Janita Toerien lets us in on the little things you may overlook when shopping for your dress.

    WEAR THE RIGHT UNDERWEAR
    You head into the changing area with a pile of gorgeous dresses, you try on the first one and it is just so… anti-climactic. Why doesn’t it look like you imagined? Well, for one, you’re wearing a bright blue thong that throws off the whole look. Wear the right underwear so the G-string doesn’t make a shadow on the dress or you stress about panties that cut into your bum, says Janita. Fitting consultants won’t judge you on your granny panties or boy shorts! Wearing undies that match your skin tone and shape, and suck in where necessary, help smooth out the silhouette so you can see exactly how the dress is meant to fit.

    FACTOR IN WHERE YOU’RE GETTING MARRIED
    Janita says this is often forgotten: Is the dress practical for your wedding? Consider the physical aspects of where you’re getting married and how your dress will fit into that. For example, a heavy lace-trimmed train and veil will pick up little twigs and dirt as you walk down the aisle of a forest wedding. Or a heavy duchess satin dress will be uncomfortable hot at a midday beach wedding. Choose a dress in the style you love, but that will still allow you to be as comfortable as possible.

    THINK ABOUT THE GIRLS
    Don’t overlook the importance of your boobs: Too much cleavage can distract from your overall look; too covered up can look matronly, not to mention ensuring there’s no accidental spillage. Big busts always look great in a lower neckline, Janita says, but not too low – just enough to open up the chest and shoulder area. This can be a V-neck, off-the-shoulder or scooped neckline. But stay away from strapless, she pleads: “I could write a whole page about why, but for now just heed my advice.” For our flatter-chested sisters, your choices are much wider, but if you want your bust to appear larger, raise the neckline of the dress, she says. Whether it’s a halterneck, V-neck, boat or round neck, simply lift that line a few centimetres.

    WALK, SIT, CROUCH, BEND, DANCE!
    Standing in front of a mirror for 10 minutes isn’t going to give you the full effect of how a dress really wears. Does the top slip down? Do the straps fall off your shoulders? Does the bodice cut into your stomach when you sit? Do you trip on the hem? Get a feel for the dress by sitting, crouching, hugging your mom and busting out a move with your hands in the air. If at any point you have to readjust it, imagine doing that a couple of hundred times on the big day. If it can be fixed with alterations, get them done. If not, it’s probably best to move on.

    ASK ABOUT FABRICS
    Will it crease badly? Show sweat patches? Make you itchy? Don’t assume all dresses are made equal. Every kind of fabric has its own characteristics, Janita says, so a dress designer worth their salt will take the time to explain the different options and their pros and cons. Take bride fabric shopping to discuss exactly this. Does the fabric feel good on her skin? Does she perspire easily when under stress or does she have sensitive skin? These are all things to take into consideration.

    BUY FOR YOUR CURRENT SIZE, NOT YOUR IDEAL SIZE
    Many brides go on a weight-loss mission before the wedding. If you’re one of them, it’s best to try lose the weight (or close enough) before you start shopping around. You never know if you’re going to lose the weight in time, so don’t buy around what might happen. The last thing you want is an ill-fitting dress on your big day. It’s much easier to take a dress in with alterations than it is to let out, with much less risk of losing the dress completely.

    CLOSE YOUR CIRCLE
    What dress-shopping mistakes does Janita see brides making all the time?
    “They bring too many people with them, and do far too much shopping. First rule: when you start shopping, make sure you don’t want to have any more than three brides in your bridal party. Choose only two or three designers/boutiques to visit, and if you feel exhausted and overwhelmed at some point, take a step back, regroup and really think about what you want – ignore everyone else’s opinions.”

    EMERGENCY KIT:
    What should you pack for the day of the wedding?
    • Needle and thread
    • Double-sided tape
    • A pair of good scissors (Cut that train off if it gets in the way of dancing! Janita says)

    ALSO SEE: High-neck wedding dresses we love

    High-neck wedding dresses we love

    Written by Andrea Robertson for Wedding Etc. Summer 2019

    Feature image: Pexels

    While much of the planning attention often centres on the bride, the groom has an important role to play too. A few simple preparations can help you look sharp, feel comfortable and stay calm throughout the celebration. These tips will help ensure everything runs smoothly before (and while) you say “I do”.

    Bring a spare shirt

    Weddings can be emotional, busy and sometimes warm. Between nerves, hugs and dancing, it’s easy to sweat through a shirt. Pack a second crisp shirt so you can change before the reception or photos later in the day.

    Empty your pockets

    Phones, wallets, keys and loose change can create awkward bulges in suit trousers and they will show in photos. Before the ceremony and portraits, do a quick pocket check and hand essentials to a groomsman.

    Break in your shoes

    Brand-new dress shoes might look great, but they can quickly become uncomfortable. Wear them around the house a few times before the wedding to soften the leather and avoid blisters.

    Do a full outfit trial

    Try on your entire outfit before the big day, from tie or bowtie to cufflinks and shoes. A quick dress rehearsal ensures nothing is missing and helps you feel confident getting ready on the morning of the wedding.

    Prepare your accessories

    Small details complete the look. Lay out your cufflinks, watch, belt, tie clip and pocket square the night before so you’re not rushing to find them while getting dressed.

    Practise your speech

    If you’re planning to give a speech, run through it a few times beforehand. You don’t need to memorise every word, but feeling familiar with the flow will help calm nerves and make the moment feel more natural.

    Keep a small groom kit

    A simple emergency kit can save the day. Include items like deodorant, breath mints, tissues, a lint roller and stain remover wipes and ask a groomsman to keep it nearby.

    Trim and groom ahead of time

    Schedule haircuts or beard trims two to three days before the wedding. This allows everything to settle so you look polished but natural in photos.

    Assign a trusted groomsman

    Give one groomsman the responsibility of holding essentials like the rings, vows or your phone. It keeps your pockets empty and your mind free from small worries.

    ALSO SEE: Wedding ceremony tips to know before you walk down the aisle

    Wedding ceremony tips to know before you walk down the aisle

    Feature image: Pexels