When it comes to planning your big day, you want your closest people by your side to get your through. Things will get crazy, overwhelming and exhausting which is where your A-team step in.

But how do you know who to ask? Who should be your maid of honour and should you even have one? There will most likely be many outside voices telling you what to do, feelings of moral obligation or pressure from your partner around who to include in your bridal party. Take a breath, we’re here to help.

If you have no idea who to ask, consider the following guidelines.

You have the right to choose

It’s your wedding. Not your mother’s,  mother-in-law’s or sister’s wedding. You should be comfortable with the people around you, trust them and be able to rely on them. Choose people you know well, have a close relationship with and that you know carry your happiness at heart.

Your maid/man of honour needs certain qualities

Some traditions dictate that a bride should ask her closest female family member to be the maid of honour, while others firmly believe that it should be your longest-standing friend. While your man/maid of honour might tick both those boxes, the most important thing is that he or she must be your closest friend. They may be a sister, cousin or school friend, but they may also be a recently met colleague, sports mate or even an older person who is a role model and mentor in your life.

That being said, they will need to handle some arrangements, do a lot of planning and be hands-on during the process. As such, they would need to be at least a semi-organised person, live close enough to see you regularly and know you well enough to avoid planning things you would not enjoy.

Your bridal party don’t need to be best friends with each other

The maid of honour and bridesmaids are a group of people who all love you, but they don’t need to love each other. Yes, you want them to have a good time and getting along will be a bonus, but the main thing is that you have the people there that you want. If they really care about you, they will put any potential differences aside and work together as a team to make your dream come true.

You are allowed to exclude people 

This part sounds harsh, but it might be necessary. As with guests, you can’t always have everybody there. Sometimes practicalities just won’t allow it and other times it could be that people expect things of you that are unfair. If it so happens that you and your partner’s sister just don’t see eye to eye, for example, you shouldn’t have to feel pressured to include her in the bridal party. It would probably be a relief to them as much as it is to you, if you don’t ask them.

Remember this is your big day and your happiness counts most.

Picture: Unsplash

Flowers are stunning, but they’re also a bit expected for a wedding day. Why not swop them out for some adorable puppies instead?

Puppy bouquets are a great alternative that offers more than just a few extra cute wedding guests. Couples work with animal shelters and rescues to showcase the sweet pups at their weddings in the hopes that someone in the crowd will adopt them. This way, you help dogs in need find their forever home.

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If you love this idea and would like to include it in your big day, there are a few things to keep in mind. The health and safety of the dogs must be a top priority, so it is important you have structures in place to protect them.

Before bringing the dogs, make sure a welfare check has been conducted. Things to consider are whether they are old enough to be taken away from their mother, whether they have been vaccinated, and whether any of them have any injuries or anxieties that may affect them being outside.

These puppies are not toys, and not meant to be held throughout the ceremony. Instead of carrying them down the aisle, the bridal party can simply swop out their floral bouquets for the pups during the official wedding photoshoot. This limits the time they have to be held down.

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For the photoshoot, make sure to brief your party on the proper way to hold a dog as those without pets may to be familiar how to do it.

It’s also important to be considerate of loud noises. If you plan on having dogs present, a fireworks display is a really bad idea as it can make them very nervous and scared. Loud music, horns or just the general traffic of a busy wedding can all contribute to their anxiety.

Having a safe space where the pups can rest, away from the guests will also be really helpful.

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Feature image: Pexels

Since you’ve been given the honour of speaking at a loved ones wedding, you probably don’t want to dissapoint them. However, as much as a wedding toast is privilage it can also be a daunting challenge.

“There are so many things that could go wrong,” is likely along the lines of what you’re thinking. It seems that wedding toasts commonly take one of two paths. On the one hand they are either extremely memorable and everyone is in tears (of laughter or emotion), or on the other they are disastrous, inappropriate and downright cringe-worthy.

Of course, you’ll be trying your hardest to be the former, rather than the latter. To ensure you’re giving the best toast possible, here are some tips:

– Open with how you know the newly weds 

It will give context to your speech for those who are not aware of who you are, and is generally considered to be more a police gesture.

– Address both partners

Just because only one of them have been through thick and thin with you, doesn’t mean you get to completely ignore the other! They are sharing this special day and you have been asked to share it with them. It would be rude to make it about only one of them.

– Be sure to add personal touches 

Weddings are very personal occasions. The couple and the audience will love hearing your anecdotes and emotions and they will repond better than if you used a generic speech that could have been taken staight of of the internet.

– Things you shouldn’t include

There are some serious no-go’s when it comes to wedding toasts. These are: crude language, inappropriate or explicit stories, and anything about the exes of those getting married. No matter what. Do not include these in your speech.

– Be aware of time 

We all know that nobody really wants to listen to a long, dragged out speech at a wedding. People will get bored. Be sure to stick to a reaonable time frame, maybe 3 to 6 minutes long. Don’t make it too short either though, it will seem as though you were uninterested and didn’t take the job seriously!

– No inside jokes 

Most of the audience wouldn’t understand the joke, and the reaction will not be what you want it to be… I can assure you. Don’t add it, it’s not worth it.

Image: Unsplash