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    There are few wedding-day moments as intimate as standing across from the person you love while someone guides you into your next chapter. And yet, when couples begin planning, the officiant is often treated like a last-minute booking rather than one of the most important decisions of the entire celebration.

    The truth? Your officiant sets the tone for the ceremony. They carry the energy of the room, calm nerves, direct emotion, and shape the experience your guests will remember long after the dance floor empties.

    Whether you’re planning a deeply traditional nikah, a modern garden ceremony, or something beautifully unconventional, finding the right officiant matters more than most couples realise.

    Here’s how to choose one that feels genuinely aligned with you.

    Decide what kind of ceremony you actually want

    Before you begin searching, ask yourselves one question: What do we want this ceremony to feel like?

    Do you picture something spiritual and faith-led? Romantic and relaxed? Short and simple? Emotional and story-driven? Formal and elegant? The answer will immediately narrow down the kind of officiant you need.

    Some couples want an officiant who feels warm and conversational, while others prefer someone more traditional and structured. Neither is wrong – but choosing someone whose style clashes with your vision can make the ceremony feel disconnected from the rest of the day.

    Your ceremony should feel like an extension of your relationship, not a script being read at you.

    Personality fit matters more than couples expect

    A technically qualified officiant is one thing. A good emotional fit is another entirely.

    You’ll be sharing vulnerable moments with this person. They’ll be speaking about your relationship in front of your closest friends and family. If the chemistry feels awkward, overly performative, or impersonal during your first conversation, trust that instinct.

    The right officiant should make you feel comfortable almost immediately. You should leave the meeting feeling calmer – not more stressed.

    Pay attention to whether they:

    • Listen well
    • Ask thoughtful questions
    • Respect your boundaries and beliefs
    • Understand your dynamic as a couple
    • Feel adaptable rather than overly rehearsed

    Because the best ceremonies never feel copy-and-pasted.

    Don’t ignore the legal side

    Romance aside, there’s paperwork involved – and this is where couples sometimes get caught out.

    In South Africa, your officiant must be legally authorised to solemnise marriages if you want the legal ceremony handled on the day itself. Some couples choose to do the legal signing separately and have a symbolic ceremony afterwards, which opens up more flexibility.

    Either way, clarify:

    • Whether they are legally registered
    • What documents are required
    • Whether they handle submissions to Home Affairs
    • If there are additional fees for travel or administration
    • Sorting out the logistics early prevents unnecessary stress later.
    • Ask to hear or read past ceremonies

    A polished Instagram page doesn’t always translate into a meaningful ceremony.

    Ask if they can share excerpts from previous ceremonies, testimonials, or videos. This gives you a better sense of their speaking style, pacing, warmth, and ability to hold a room emotionally.

    You’re looking for authenticity – not someone trying to go viral during your vows.

    Make space for personalisation

    The most memorable ceremonies are usually the ones that feel deeply personal.

    Maybe that means including cultural traditions, bilingual vows, a moment of prayer, family involvement, poetry, or a retelling of your love story that actually sounds like you. A good officiant will help shape those details naturally instead of forcing you into a rigid format.

    And if you’re a couple who hates being the centre of attention? Tell them. A skilled officiant knows how to create emotional impact without making the ceremony feel uncomfortable or theatrical.

    Don’t leave it too late

    Popular officiants book out months – sometimes more than a year – in advance, especially during peak wedding season.

    Once you’ve secured your venue and date, start researching officiants alongside your photographer and planner. Waiting until the final stretch often means settling for whoever is available instead of someone who genuinely fits your vision.

    Final thoughts

    Flowers wilt. Table settings get packed away. Even the smallest details guests swore they’d remember eventually blur together.

    But the ceremony? That stays with people.

    The right officiant doesn’t just conduct your wedding – they anchor it. They create the emotional heartbeat of the day and help turn a beautiful event into a meaningful memory.

    So, take your time. Ask questions. Trust your instincts. And choose someone who makes standing at the altar feel a little less nerve-wracking and a lot more like coming home.

    ALSO SEE: How to be the best wedding MC

    How to be the best wedding MC

    Featured image: Caleb Oquendo / Pexels

    For all the energy that goes into planning the perfect wedding, the wedding morning itself is often treated like an afterthought. But ask almost any bride, photographer or makeup artist, and they’ll tell you the same thing: the tone of the morning sets the tone for the entire day.

    And while social media tends to romanticise matching robes, champagne towers and perfectly curated flat lays, the reality is that wedding mornings can become overwhelming very quickly.

    The good news? Most of the stress brides experience before the ceremony comes from a few very avoidable mistakes.

    Here are five wedding morning mistakes brides often regret – and what to do instead.

    Trying to manage the entire wedding from the bridal suite

    If you’re answering supplier calls while getting your hair done, your morning is already becoming more stressful than it needs to be. One of the biggest mistakes brides make is feeling like they need to oversee every detail until the very last second.

    But the truth is, your wedding morning is not the time to coordinate logistics, troubleshoot décor issues or respond to timeline questions.

    That’s exactly why coordinators, bridesmaids and trusted family members exist. Choose one person to handle any problems or supplier communication on the day and let them protect your peace a little. Most issues can be solved without involving you at all.

    Because the reality is: you only get this morning once. You deserve to experience it.

    Forgetting to eat and hydrate

    It sounds obvious, but this happens far more often than people realise. Between nerves, excitement and early glam call times, many brides unintentionally survive the morning on coffee, champagne and adrenaline alone – which usually catches up to them halfway through photos or during the ceremony itself.

    Low energy, headaches, dizziness and emotional overwhelm are often made worse simply because the body hasn’t been looked after properly.

    A proper breakfast and consistent hydration genuinely make a difference. Nothing overly heavy – just enough to keep your energy stable throughout the day.

    Your makeup will sit better, your body will feel better, and you’ll enjoy the celebration instead of trying to recover from exhaustion by sunset.

    Turning the bridal suite into a Pinterest set

    There’s nothing wrong with wanting beautiful details and aesthetic moments. That’s part of the fun. But sometimes wedding mornings become so focused on creating content that the atmosphere starts feeling chaotic instead of calm.

    Too many personalised items, unnecessary props, overcrowded spaces and excessive décor can quickly make the room feel stressful – especially once photographers, hairstylists, makeup artists and bridesmaids are all moving around simultaneously.

    Ironically, the most beautiful wedding morning photos usually come from spaces that feel natural, relaxed and emotionally present.

    Keep the meaningful details. Let go of the pressure to make every corner “Instagram-worthy.”

    Not leaving enough buffer time

    Wedding mornings almost always take longer than expected. Someone forgets earrings. Hair takes an extra thirty minutes. Steamers stop working. A bridesmaid suddenly needs safety pins. Something will happen.

    And when the schedule is too tight, even small delays create unnecessary panic.

    One of the smartest things couples can do is intentionally build breathing room into the timeline. Aim to be ready earlier than necessary instead of exactly on time.

    Because rushing changes the entire energy of the morning – and, unfortunately, it’s often one of the things brides remember most afterwards.

    Forgetting to be present in the moment

    This is probably the biggest one of all.

    The wedding morning moves fast – faster than most brides expect. One minute you’re sitting in pyjamas with coffee, and the next you’re stepping into your dress preparing to walk down the aisle. And somewhere between the glam, timelines and excitement, many brides forget to pause and absorb what’s happening.

    Take a few quiet moments if you can. Put your phone down occasionally. Look around the room. Hug your people properly. Let yourself feel the day instead of racing through it. Because years from now, you probably won’t remember every tiny detail that went right or wrong.

    But you will remember how the morning felt.

    The best wedding mornings rarely look perfect

    Ironically, the wedding mornings people remember most fondly are usually the ones that felt genuine – not flawless.

    It’s the laughter while getting ready. Your mom crying while saying, “But you were just a little girl yesterday.” The “this is the last time we’re doing this before you’re a wife” comments, or a sibling casually stealing your glass of water while you’re trying not to smudge your lipstick. The quiet, intimate presence of the people you love surrounding you while everything is about to change.

    Not because everything was perfectly in place, but because everything was felt deeply.

    Raw emotion. Real connection. Authentic love in a room that will never feel exactly like that again. And somehow, that’s what stays with you the most.

    ALSO SEE: 5 Ways to practice self care while planning your wedding

    5 Ways to practice self care while planning your wedding

    Featured image: Pinterest 

    Planning a wedding requires a lot of patience, time and attention to detail. For many it can be quite stressful and can take a toll on not only your time, but your emotions as well. Which begs the questions… are you a bridezilla or a bridechilla?

    Bridezilla 

    This is a bride who is stressing about everything and has little to no, well, ‘chill’. She’s determined and dead-set on getting her way and making sure everyone complies. A bridezilla has imagined her wedding day for what seems like forever and nothing is going to stop her from ensuring that her big day is exactly how she pictured. There’s nothing wrong with going after what you want, but be aware that these brides are usually not considerate of those around them and this can relate to money, schedules etc.

    Bridezillas want things a certain way and want to make sure that their big day is perfect in every way. They’re usually very hands-on and will want control over all aspects of the planning. Wedding planner? What wedding planner??

    If she’s surrounded by people who are unsure and don’t really know what to do, where to lend a hand or what to contribute, then a bridezilla may not be all that bad. After all, she’ll tell them.

    The bridezilla will have planned everything down to the smallest detail, because she wants that first-hand reassurance that everything will be smooth sailing. Because when it comes to your wedding and paying large amounts of money, you want to know what’s going on 100% of the time.

    Bridechilla

    Basically, everything that was mentioned above, just the complete opposite. The bridechilla doesn’t seem to fuss over things and she just goes with the flow. It’s not that she’s careless, but she’s just not worried about everything as much. She doesn’t seek control over every little aspect of the planning process.

    Being a bridechilla seems like it’s the easy choice, but it’s important to keep some things in mind about the laid back bride.

    There is such a thing as being too chilled. When the bride-to-be is showing little to no interest about the wedding planning, there’s a great possibility that those around her will have to pick up the slack.

    Some people enjoy some direction. For example, a bridechilla may tell her bridesmaids to wear what they want. This may leave them feeling confused and unsure of what exactly to wear or what the limitations are. Stress and frustration can be transferred to those around the bridechilla.

    So… are you one of them?

    This is your big day after all, so it should be exactly what you want, but you shouldn’t be over-stressing and taking all the fun out of it. With that being said, you shouldn’t allow those around you to carry all the weight, or, alternatively, feel like they have no say at all.

    Trying to maintain a balance of both is the ideal – taking control but also letting go when needed. It’s great to know what you want and to have control of the planning, but you shouldn’t be too forceful, and don’t forget to chill out now and then.

    ALSO SEE: Bridesmaid proposal ideas

    Bridesmaid ‘proposal’ ideas

    Feature image: Pexels

    If you’ve just made it past the potential minefield that is the guest list, here’s your next challenge: How are you going to seat everyone? Round tables? Long ones? One long banquet table? Goodness. Read on to set your mind free from all these decisions…

    1. DANCE FLOOR FIRST!
    This is your starting point. The most popular – and effective – option is to plonk your dance floor in the centre of the room. Then you’ll position the band or DJ against the wall. If your venue doesn’t allow for this, you can place the dance floor at one end of the room, centred and backed up against a wall.

    2. FIND YOUR TABLES
    Choose the shape and size of your tables – but regardless of this, make sure the two of you are in a central spot that your guests can see. Figure out how many guests fit at each table, to determine how many tables you will need.

    3. THE FLOOR PLAN
    Start with yourself and your SO – you get the best seats in the house, whether that means with the best view or closest to the bar (it’s been a long few months!) Then arrange your tables as symmetrically as possible – in a U-shape around the centre dance floor or fill one end of the space (if the dance floor is on the one side).

    4. VIPs
    Reserve the tables closest to the two of you for your immediate families, and set aside tables further from the band/DJ for older guests. The less desirable seats should be saved for your friends. Keep people together who will enjoy the time together – perhaps there are family members who haven’t seen each other in a while?

    5. THE BAR
    This will also be dependent on your venue, but as a rule of thumb, the bar should be away from the entrance to avoid possible congestion. If you have more than one bar (one bar with two bartenders for every 100 guests is a good point of measure), then position one close to the dance floor and another one on the other side of the room.

    6. ARRANGE THE NAMES
    Now that the hard work is over, how are you going to let your guests know where to sit on the day? If you have more than 75 guests, displaying their names in alphabetical order is the most convenient option, to eliminate confusion and unnecessary time spent at the seating chart. To make it more exciting, give each guest a refreshing cocktail or glass of bubbly along with their table number – it really sets the tone for a festive reception!

    ALSO SEE: How to save money on wedding flowers without sacrificing style

    How to save money on wedding flowers without sacrificing style

    Written by Claire Davies for Wedding Etc. Summer 2020

    Feature image: Pexels

    If your wedding falls during Ramadan and you have Muslim guests, you might wonder how to make the experience a respectful one for them during this time. With a little thought, you can ensure everyone feels included while you enjoy your day. These simple tips help you plan a wedding during Ramadan that works for all your guests.

    Time it right
    Avoid food-focused moments like canapés, cocktail hour or dinner before sunset if you can. Ramadan shifts each year, so sunset (iftar) times change daily and by city. Check a local timetable online. Even noting sunset on your programme helps guests plan.

    Offer simple iftar
    A small iftar table at sunset is thoughtful. Dates, water, juice or light snacks — enough to break the fast comfortably.

    Talk to your caterer
    Let your caterer know in advance about fasting guests and halal meal requests. Keep meals warm or plated later if needed. Small adjustments go a long way.

    Cocktail hour before sunset?

    If you have a cocktail hour before sunset, provide comfortable seating and social spaces so fasting guests can enjoy themselves without focusing only on food.

    Provide quiet spaces
    Some guests may want to pray after sunset. A small, private room is helpful. Not mandatory, just considerate.

    Share information in advance
    Mention that your wedding falls during Ramadan on your website or invitations. Let guests know you’ve considered fasting and halal options. It helps them plan and shows respect.

    Don’t assume everyone is fasting
    Children and those with health reasons may not fast. Flexibility is key, so focus on consideration, not assumptions.

    Small gestures count
    A quick check-in with Muslim guests before the day — asking if there’s anything that would make it easier — is often appreciated more than any big arrangement.

    ALSO SEE: 7 quirky wedding ideas perfect for summer

    7 quirky wedding ideas perfect for summer

    Feature image: Pexels

    You’ve had the big engagement and decided on a date – now it’s time to get down to the planning but your partner doesn’t seem keen on contributing. Wedding planning can be stressful enough without having a partner who is not interested in helping out, so we’ve put together these five tips to get your partner involved in planning your big day together.

    1. FROM THE GET-GO

    Make sure you are both discussing wedding options from the start. You don’t want to get ahead without your partner and leave them behind, only to want their input later on.

    2. BE OPEN MINDED

    Your partner may have some strange ideas, but try not to brush them off harshly, as you want them to continue making contributions. If you don’t like something, be gentle and explain why.

    3. GET HANDS-ON

    If there are certain areas that you know your partner will be interested in, such as the music, food or transport, then hand over those tasks, making sure you are both on the same page when it comes to what you want.

    4. ASK FOR HELP

    If you’re struggling to juggle all of the invitations, nagging family members and bookings, ask your partner if they can take on some of the tasks, or that you work on them together to ease the pressure.

    5. JUST BE HONEST

    Tell your partner that you want their input, after all, you both decided to have a wedding. Having open communication will help you to express how you feel as well as finding out what your partner wants.

    ALSO SEE: 5 ways to avoid a family takeover at your wedding

    5 ways to avoid a family takeover at your wedding

    Feature image: Priscilla du Preez/Unsplash

    Calling the family and posting on the Gram? Duh! But what else should you do after he’s popped the question?

    1 CELEBRATE!

    This doesn’t have to be a full-on engagement party just yet. In the days after you announce your impending nuptials, your phone will be buzzing off the hook with well-wishers hoping to see you as soon as possible and hear all about how he got down on one knee. So plan a little get-together to pop bottles with your nearest and dearest and tell them everything. Or, if you are a more low-key kind of couple, simply have a special night for two to revel in all the butterflies you’re feeling at the moment. Being engaged is a wonderful time. Enjoy it to the fullest.

    2 GET YOUR RING INSURED (AND SIZED!)

    The months leading up to your wedding are going to be split between days of pure joy and days of pure admin… So. Much. Admin. First up: You now have a small fortune on your finger, so be sure to protect your new asset and get it insured. Your guy should’ve been supplied with a valuation certificate upon purchase, but if not, take it to any reputable jeweller to get a value estimate. Send this to your insurance company to get it covered in case it gets lost or stolen. And while you’re at it, have it sized perfectly for your finger to make losing it less likely.

    3 SET A (VAGUE) DATE

    After “Let me see the ring!” and “How did he propose?”, the next most asked question you’ll get at this stage is “When’s the wedding?”. Unless you know exactly how it’s going to go down to the very last detail on a sunny day in February, you probably haven’t even thought about a date. Chat to your hubby-to-be and come up with a ‘thereabouts’ answer. Whether it’s “next summer” or “in three years’ time”, giving people some sort of timeline will ease the bombardment while also letting your guests mentally save the date.

    4 DETERMINE THE TYPE OF WEDDING

    Small getaway wedding or the do of the year at an exclusive wine farm? Figuring this out with your man is the best starting point of the planning to come, as it will help you determine everything from what venues to look at, to your all-important budget and guest list size.

    5 GATHER INSPIRATION

    Real talk time. Everyone from Chatty Cathy at the office to your mom and well-meaning-but-pushy friends are going to start pressuring you to begin planning. There’s so much to do, after all. Yes, Cathy, there is… but there’s no need to jump into contacting vendors and venues now if you don’t have the basics decided yet. You’ll cut down on a lot of wasted time if you know what you want before getting stuck in. Get on Pinterest and flip through wedding magazines. This is the fun part! Make a mood board with the images you love and you’ll soon start to see your dream day to come to life. Once you know what you want, seeking out the right vendors for you will be that much easier.


    BOOK AN ENGAGEMENT SHOOT

    Photographers get snapped up way in advance, so if this is a route you want to go down – book it now! Otherwise, call on your creative friends to help set up a photoshoot of the two of you on the beach, in a forest, or even at home just being yourselves. Smartphone cameras are more than enough to get some amazing shots (don’t forget the dreamy filters!).


    ALSO SEE: Locally loved flowers for your wedding bouquet

    Locally loved flowers for your wedding bouquet

    Written by Andrea Robertson for Summer 2019 print edition.

    Feature image: Pexels

    In the midst of wedding planning, pre-wedding celebrations, or the transition into married life, taking time to pause can feel both indulgent and essential. Whether you’re planning a calming escape before the big day, a romantic honeymoon, or a restorative bachelorette getaway, spa retreats offer a meaningful way to reconnect, unwind and reset together.

    South Africa is home to an exceptional collection of spa retreats that lend themselves beautifully to wedding-related travel. Blending luxury with nature and indulgence with intention, these destinations range from secluded mountain hideaways to vineyard sanctuaries and refined city escapes, making them ideal for honeymoons, bachelorettes and pre-wedding escapes alike.

    1. Santé Wellness Retreat & Spa – Cape Winelands

    Tucked away in the serene valleys of the Cape Winelands, Santé Wellness Retreat & Spa is a sophisticated choice for couples or bridal parties seeking a structured yet luxurious wellness experience. Known for its comprehensive spa treatments and detox programmes, Santé combines tailored health assessments with holistic therapies designed to restore both body and mind.

    With world-class facilities including hydrotherapy, Pilates and yoga studios, sauna and a heated indoor pool, it is well suited to couples wanting a mindful start to married life, or brides looking to arrive at the aisle feeling balanced and radiant.

    2. Bushmans Kloof Wilderness Reserve & Wellness Retreat – Cederberg

    For couples or groups drawn to nature-led experiences, Bushmans Kloof Wilderness Reserve offers a deeply immersive retreat. Set high in the Cederberg Mountains, this escape pairs luxurious spa therapies with wide-open landscapes, ancient rock art and outdoor exploration.

    Riverside massages, open-air treatments and guided hikes make it a compelling option for adventurous honeymoons or intimate bachelorette retreats where nature, stillness and connection take centre stage.

    3. Healing Earth Transformative Wellness – KwaZulu-Natal Midlands

    Located in the rolling countryside of the Midlands Meander, Healing Earth Transformative Wellness is ideal for slower-paced celebrations or pre-wedding wind-downs. The spa’s bespoke treatments are inspired by nature and tailored to individual needs, offering everything from restorative massages to calming facial therapies.

    With an outdoor yoga deck, wellness pool and tranquil spaces for relaxation, this retreat works beautifully for small bridal groups or couples seeking quiet luxury in a countryside setting.

    4. Future Found Sanctuary – Cape Town

    Just outside Cape Town, Future Found Sanctuary offers a regenerative wellness experience that feels both secluded and accessible. Set against the slopes of Table Mountain, the retreat is surrounded by fynbos and sweeping mountain views, creating a serene backdrop for honeymoons or pre-wedding escapes.

    The spa focuses on sensory renewal, with treatments complemented by forest walks, meditation spaces and guided wellness activities. It is an excellent choice for couples wanting meaningful relaxation without straying too far from the city.

    5. Babylonstoren Spa – Cape Winelands Botanical Retreat

    For couples or bridal parties who appreciate refined, nature-inspired luxury, Babylonstoren is a standout destination. Set on a historic working farm, the spa draws heavily on the surrounding botanical gardens, offering herbal steam baths, botanical massages and open-air hot pools.

    Between treatments, guests can explore the gardens, enjoy farm-to-table dining or simply soak in the views of vineyards and mountains, making it particularly appealing for romantic honeymoons or indulgent pre-wedding stays.

    6. The Saxon Spa – Johannesburg

    For those planning a city-based escape, The Saxon Spa in Johannesburg offers an elegant urban sanctuary with five-star appeal. Known for its holistic, results-driven treatments, the spa combines advanced skincare and body therapies with classic luxury.

    Thermo-therapy suites, bespoke facials and tranquil gardens provide a polished yet peaceful environment, ideal for a short honeymoon stopover or a sophisticated bachelorette retreat without leaving the city.

    Tips for Planning a Wedding-Focused Spa Escape

    • Book well in advance: Spa retreats are popular for honeymoons and group bookings, particularly at sought-after properties.

    • Consider group-friendly options: Some spas offer tailored packages for couples or bridal parties, including private facilities or shared treatments.

    • Balance indulgence with experience: Pair spa time with gentle activities such as yoga, guided walks or wine tastings to create a well-rounded stay.

    ALSO SEE: Should you have a joint bachelor and bachelorette party?

    Should you have a joint bachelor and bachelorette party?

    Written by Zoe Erasmus for Getaway.

    Feature image: Pexels