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    Getting married is a big step. When you enter into a union with someone, you promise to be with them, for better of for worse, for the rest of your lives. Unfortunately, almost of half of marriages today end in divorce.

    Marriage is hard, and many walk into it not understanding that reality. While you cannot always be 100% ready, there are many things you can do to prepare yourself for this new life you plan to enter. If you’re thinking of getting engaged, make sure you know these things about your partner beforehand.

    Financial situation and spending habits:

    Money is a major stress in relationships. Ideally, you need to have a general idea of your significant others financial situation before getting engaged. If someone is in debt or has bad credit, that could impact their partner in the future. You should ideally also know your partners spending habits, so that you’re on the same page about budgeting. This will particularly come in handy when you start planning your wedding.

    How you feel about kids:

    This is the all-important question. As much as many people dream of one day being a parent, there are others who don’t. Wanting or not wanting kids is an important conversation to have with your partner and can cause big problems in your marriage if you’re not on the same page. If you do want kids, also make sure to discuss how many you want, how you would want them to be raised and the kind of parent you want to be.

    Religion/faith/belief systems:

    The topic of religion can sometimes be tricky. Whether you’re Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Jewish, or Athiest, the important thing is that your partner knows about your belief system. Its not the particular faith system that is of importance, just how that will impact your relationship. For example, if you follow different faiths and want children, which faith will you raise them in? Will someone be expected to convert?

    Their beliefs can also shape how they see things in the world and their stance on issues such as abortion, same-sex relationships, and gender roles. If these causes are important to you and your partner feels differently, that could cause big issues. While you don’t have to agree, you do have to be tolerant of each others beliefs.

    Living habits:

    If you don’t already live together, you might be in for a shock when you do join homes. It is important to know each others living habits beforehand to prevent future issues. What if your partner loves having people around all the time but you enjoy solitude? Or they’re neat and cannot leave the house in the morning if it’s in a mess while you’re more of a ‘I’ll clean it later’ type of person? Small issues like these can grow into massive arguments if you’re not aware of them beforehand and have established a middle ground.

    Love languages:

    Love is about more than just lust. It’s about making your partner feel seen. Your love language, or how you express love towards others, can cause issues if your partner cannot identify it. If your love is shown through physical affection but your partners is words of affirmation, they could feel overwhelmed by your constant PDA and long for you to use your words more than your body. When you understand each others love language, you understand the meaning behind each others actions, making your actions that much more impactful.

    How to effectively communicate:

    Communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship. If you cannot speak and listen to each other well, your relationship will be fraught with issues.  Fore example, If your partner bottles their feelings, that could cause them to build up resentment towards you because they cannot effectively communicate their needs. You, in turn, could end up feeling guilty about something you didn’t even know was an issue. You need to know how to discuss and resolve conflicts in a healthy way that won’t exacerbate issues.

    Family and friend dynamics:

    Hopefully, if you’re at the point of getting engaged, you’ve met your significant others’ family and friends. These people have known your partner longer than you, and can thus give you greater insights that you might not have known.

    While you might be used to your specific family dynamic, your partner might have a completely different one. For example, if you’re family is the overbearing type, your partner needs to be prepared for them most likely having lots of opinions on your marriage. Understanding family dynamics will allow you to place boundaries on what is acceptable behaviour and what isn’t, making family gatherings much easier.

    Your goals for the future:

    While we can’t predict the future, we can be honest about our desires. If you have specific goals that could make considerable changes to your life, your partner needs to be aware of them. Popular grounds for divorce is that couples want different things. What if you’ve got dreams of relocating to the city while your partner wants a quiet life in the suburbs? Or you want to be a career woman but your partner expects you to become a stay-at-home mom? These differences in life goals can breed resentment if not discussed beforehand in a healthy manner.

    Image: Pexels

    An engagement ring holds a large amount of significance for a couple. For hundreds of years, the classic diamond has been a major trend for engagement rings, often honoured for their simple beauty, shine, and value.

    But with more and more traditions evolving, the classic diamond engagement ring is slowly being replaced with other special stones, materials and designs that value originality, affordability and meaning.

    Take a look at our top picks for alternative engagement rings:

    1. TANZANITE

    The next best thing to diamonds is the striking tanzanite. With its deep blue, this stone can complement a silver, rose gold or white gold band beautifully. As far as cut goes, tanzanite is popular in many shapes. This teardrop ring shows how tanzanite can pair with other jewels as well.

    2. MORGANITE

    With a light, dusty pink tint, morganite is an affordable and stunning stone which signifies unconditional love and compassion – two necessary traits in all marriages. This stone is equally as versatile due to its light shade and works well with all metals.

    3. JEWEL BAND

    If you want to have a more practical and simple engagement ring, then a plain band with a few jewels may be the one for you. Incorporate your favourite stone, or multiple to make a statement. If you opt for a brightly coloured stone such as the ruby or peridot, your band is bound to stand out.

    4.  OPAL

    Opals are a rare and highly sought after stone that adds a touch of glamour to a ring. They can give off a vintage appearance, but if you pair it with a simple silver band surrounded by smaller diamonds, it becomes a modern but still unique ring.

    5. VINTAGE

    Whether it’s an heirloom, has been bought in an antique store, or specially made to appear old-fashioned, vintage rings will always be breathtaking options for engagement rings. The metal is darker and has intricate detail, which is often accompanied by a large and neatly cut stone.

    6. ONYX

    Dare to make a bold statement with a dark and shimmery onyx centrepiece on your engagement ring. This black stone complements yellow gold in a unique and modern way, which has slowly started to pick up attraction on the market.

    7. PEARL

    Having a pearl on your engagement ring definitely adds a touch of vintage elegance. If you are a lover  of all things old-fashioned, opting for these lovely round jewels will bring your dream ring to life.

    8. ROUGH CUT

    The cut of the stone makes a big impact on the overall ring. Just simply using an uncut diamond instead of a neatly cut one can change the look and feel of your ring. A rough cut ring is more rustic and natural-looking, for a more organic finish. In this case, it’s better to seek a specialist for a hand-crafted option.

    9. TURQUOISE

    If you love to be different then this is the stone for you. Choosing a turquoise jewel for your engagement ring is a big step, as this particular stone has a very youthful appearance, especially when paired with a dainty band and smaller stones. But you will have a unique and special ring that you value, which is all that matters.

    10. SMOKY QUARTZ

    This earthy stone is a beautiful and affordable option for an exquisite natural-looking engagement ring and can be paired with silver or yellow gold for complementary tones. Marvel over its sparkle and changing colours when it catches the light.

    Image: Unsplash

    A kiss on the hand may be quite continental, but diamonds are a girl’s best friend. This saying still rings true today. Diamonds will never go out of style, but trends do. With so many options to choose from, it’s easy to get overwhelmed when choosing an engagement ring. We’ve gathered advice from jewellery experts to help you ring in your engagement in style.

    Here’s what will trend in 2020.

    Coloured stones:

    Modern brides have been leaning towards coloured stones and birthstones as of late. “I think today’s bride is more concerned with being unique, and while she still wants a three stone ring, she is looking for something that is one of a kind. Women today want to stand out!” Kendra Pariseault Jewelry told StyleCaster.

    Coloured stones are an easy way to make a statement and express your personal style. Niel Lane says that morganite stones, the pink to orange-pink variety of the beryl mineral, have especially grow in popularity this year.

    Take this trend further by using a birthstone for a personal touch to an engagement ring. Just be careful to speak to an expert beforehand, as not all birthstones are made equal. Some are not durable enough for every day wear.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BzvwwqlB-_0/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

    Unique shapes:

    Square cut and pear shaped is so played out. For a unique take, brides have been loving star-shaped and floral-shaped engagement rings. We’ve seen Elizabeth Olsen, Katy Perry, and Irina Shayk all step out with floral-shaped rings in the past year.

    This ring can be quite busy so the key is to keep the band simple. While typically centered with a coloured stone, you can simplify this style by going with a traditional diamond.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BwNeYu5lsZq/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

    Throwback designs:

    The more traditional bride will be glad to hear that vintage and art-deco inspired rings are also back in style. Inspired by the past, vintage engagement rings are heirlooms in the making.

    Art-deco is all about clean lines and geometric angles. We love how this hexagonal-shaped engagement ring still feels feminine with the array of smaller diamonds on the perimeter of the main stone. This halo effect is another big engagement ring trend, as it makes the main stone appear much larger. Two birds with one stone.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/B4dALFJlfDD/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

    Rose gold:

    Rose gold has been in for years and is going nowhere. The popularity of this tone stems from the fact that it is universally flattering. It is a bold statement yet romantic and feminine at the same time.

    “Brides will be looking more at alternative metals to white gold and platinum next year. The appeal of rose gold comes from its pale pink colour that not only pairs well with trending yellow gold fashion pieces but also looks great with every skin tone, ” said Alicia Davis, VP of Merchandising at Shane Co.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/B4gfj9Kh7Kx/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

    Three-stone rings:

    We can thank Meghan Markle for this one. The Duchess of Sussex’s three stone engagement ring sparked the trend a few years ago and it is only rising in popularity.

    “We’ve seen a lot of couples eyeing three-stone engagement rings lately,” Lauren Addison of Lauren Addison Jewelry told StyleCaster. “The two side stones add extra sparkle to a simpler engagement ring style.”

    The three stones are meant to represent the past, the present and the future, giving a beautiful symbolism. The centre diamond is typically hugged by two smaller, equally sized diamonds. For something different, use colourful stones and unique cuts.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/B4ajAg8jb-I/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

    Stacking rings:

    Sometimes, more is more. While not a new concept, jewellery stacking has taken the industry by storm. Brides have been loving stackable rings as of late.

    Commonly, the engagement ring and wedding band are designed to pair up. Some brides are taking this a step further and adding more rings to the pile. Eternity rings or embellished bands add an extra style element and bling for glitz lovers. Pairing rings of different styles, like a vintage engagement ring with more contemporary cut embellished bands, is a playful way to create a dynamic and unique finish.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/B4dutVbpBoZ/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

    Image: Pexels

    Being a groomsman is a big honour. But with great honour comes great responsibility. As a groomsman, you’ll be expected to fulfil a number of duties to aid the groom in his wedding journey. Here is a rundown of the groomsmen’s duties:

    https://www.instagram.com/p/ByrrXuuJFL2/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

    Pre-wedding prep:

    Get fitted for wedding attire:

    As a group, the groomsmen will be fitted with wedding attire to match the wedding’s theme. If a suit is being made, you might have to send your measurements through so make sure to have those on hand. Depending on the couple, you may be expected to purchase or rent the attire yourself. Make sure to set aside money for this.

     

    Attend pre-wedding events:

    Wedding festivities do not start and end with the big day. There are a host of pre-wedding events you will be expected to attend, including the engagement party, bachelor party, rehearsal dinner and of course, the wedding.

     

    Help plan the bachelor party:

    As one of the groom’s last nights as an unmarried man, the bachelor party is an important event in the pre-wedding schedule. While it is traditionally the best man’s responsibility to plan the event, groomsmen often provide a helping hand. Assist the best man in whatever he needs to pull off an epic bachelor party. You might also be expected to assist financially, so keep that in mind.

     

    The Big Day:

    Support the groom:

    The Big Day is bound to be stressful for the groom. As a groomsman, you’ll be tasked with keeping him calm throughout the day. Ease his nerves, give him pep talks when needed and make sure his look is complete before he steps out. If need be, take the lead and make sure all arrangements are organised, such as transport and liaising with photographers and caterers. This way, the groom has less to stress him out, allowing him to enjoy his Big Day.

    Give a great speech:

    While it is typically the best man’s job to give a speech, groomsmen can also be asked to say a few winged words. Give yourself enough time ahead of the wedding to write out a strong speech that highlights what makes the newly betrothed couple special.

    Give a great gift:

    By virtue of being in the wedding party, you should be close to the couple. As such, your gift should be personal to them. If you’re out of ideas, have a look at their wedding registry for inspiration.

    Have fun!

    Now that all the big things are done, you can enjoy yourself at the reception. It’s important that guests have a good time, because that’s part of what makes weddings memorable. Dance with everybody, get people talking and play games as you celebrate love.

    Image: Unsplash

     

    Congratulations, you’re engaged! Traditionally, the first step in wedding festivities is to throw an engagement party celebrating your upcoming nuptials with your nearest and dearest. Here are some key steps to planning your perfect engagement party.

    Choose the hostess with the most-est:

    While tradition states that the bride’s parents typically throw the engagement party, it is not a hard and fast rule. Today, anyone can host the party, whether it be a family member, close friend or even joint hosts. Just remember that the host will be the main funder of the party, so they have to be prepared to pay.

    Pick a date:

    Next step is to find the right date. However, this is not an easy feat. Think about the scale of the party and how long it will take to plan things before setting a date. If you are going for a big, extravagant party then allot more time to plan. Engagement parties typically occur soon after the engagement but can still be held months after the fact.

    You will also need to take into consideration the schedules of your guests. For example, if family members out of town will have to travel long distances to attend, ideally don’t host the party during the week.

    Plan your guest list:

    This is an important step. Remember that the people you invite to your engagement party will also have to be invited to your wedding. As such, this guest list is a preliminary list for your big day. If you’re not sure how big your wedding will be, allow your engagement to be more intimate so that you don’t invite too many people and create an expectation.

    Set up a budget:

    Party planning can quickly get expensive if you don’t have a financial guideline in place. Set up a budget in which you allocate certain amounts of money for the venue, food and drinks, invites and other party planning necessities. This makes every following step much easier as you narrow your options to fit financial means. Remember to leave a margin for extra expenses too!

    Location, location, location:

    Now that you know how big your guest list is, you can choose a venue that will accompany everyone. The venue will speak to the type of party you want. For example, having a party in your parents’ back yard will give an intimate feel, whereas a grand ballroom will give a more luxe feel. This way, you can create a vision of the type of decor you want too.

    Send invites:

    With date and location secured, you can now send out invites. Make sure you send these out with enough time to arrive and give your guests time to plan. At least 3 weeks before the party is ideal. Luckily, your type of venue also helps to determine the style of invitation, making the design element much easier. Make sure to let your guests know the dress-code to avoid outfit disasters.

    Set up a menu:

    Now that you know the venue, your menu can perfectly correspond. For example, if it’s a cocktail event, finger foods work best. A family-style menu works best for intimate gatherings. Don’t forget to include drinks in this! Your menu should work for you, your budget and the style of party you’re aiming for.

    Plan your decor:

    At this point, you should already have an idea of the type of decor you want. Now is the time to do your research and purchase things that will bring your vision to life. Simply adding mini-candles and fairy lights can add a whimsical yet romantic feel. Use fabric to bring in colour schemes, and flowers to soften the space.

    Gift registry:

    While not expected, some guests may want to gift you and your partner at your engagement party. To prep for this, you can set up a gift registry. Remember to focus on low- to medium-priced gifts, as people will most likely spend more on a wedding gift. You can also ask guests to donate to a chosen charity in lieu of gifts.

    Dress to impress:

    As the first taste of wedding festivities, it is typical, though not required, that engaged pairs wear white to their engagement party. Regardless of colour, make sure that your outfit works well for the venue and style of party you are throwing. For example, a casual sundress won’t work for a formal event, and a beaded gown might be a bit too dressed up for a poolside celebration.

    Enjoy!

    You’ve made it! Now is the time to revel in your excitement and celebrate your future with your loved ones.

    Image: Pixabay

    Proposing is a special and memorable event, but it doesn’t have to be over the top to make an impact.

    Here are some unique and simple ways to propose that won’t leave you planning for days, cause you stress and will ensure an instant ‘yes!’

    1. Include your fur-baby

    If you share a pet, a great way to pop the question is to include them in the proposal.

     

    View this post on Instagram

     

    How could you refuse this proposal? . . . . #proposalideas #propose #engagement #hesaidyes #shesaidyes #labrador #petproposal

    A post shared by Karina ODonnell (@simplyproposalsuk) on

    2. Photo booth proposal

    A fun way to propose that will also capture the moment.

    3. Scrabble Tiles

    Suggest a game of scrabble and use your tiles to spell out the proposal.

    4. Incorporate food

    Who wouldn’t want to be proposed to and get some yummy food at the same time?

    5. Photo album

    Create a photo album filled with memories and on the last page, ask your partner to marry you.

     

    View this post on Instagram

     

    It’s a pleasure to share one’s memories. Everything remembered is dear, endearing, touching, precious.

    A post shared by Heilsa Handmade Photo Album (@heilsadiyalbum) on

    Image: Pixabay

    Traditionally, it has always been that the man proposes to the woman. But in this day and age where gender roles are changing and same-sex relationships are legal and accepted, more and more women are bending the knee.

    Just do it

    Whether you’re a woman in a same-sex relationship or a straight relationship, you should disregard what is traditionally accepted and be able to propose to your partner. If you feel the time is right and that you and your partner are in a place to get married, there is no need to wait for them to propose; you can ask them to marry you.

    The moment

    The proposal should go the same as any traditional proposal in the sense that you plan the proposal. Look at creating a special moment that will become a beautiful memory in your relationship.

    A symbol of love

    If you are a woman proposing to a woman, then it is likely that you will present an engagement ring. If you’re a woman proposing to a man, you should consider presenting some sort of gift that they can keep forever and has sentiment to it. A great proposal gift for a man is a watch, and a great addition to that would be to get it engraved.

    Despite the fact that a woman proposing is not the norm, it certainly should be. With the dismantling of gender roles, leaving proposals solely up to men should be dismantled too.

    At the end of the day, it is a decision to get married and it should not matter who asked whom.

    Image: Unsplash

    Feeling your absolute best on your wedding day is non-negotiable. We asked Loredana Loots, an integrative nutrition and holistic health coach, for her advice on what to eat before and on your wedding day:

    “With only a few days to go and a whirlwind of emotions, arrangements and final prep, you may (understandably) not give much thought about what you are eating and drinking. What you consume actually has a major impact on how feel – physically, mentally and emotionally. Every couple deserves to look and feel like a million bucks on their special day. These handy food secrets are a must!

    Plan in advance

    Shop, prepare and store meals for the days leading up to the wedding to make sure you are not left feeling overwhelmed or forced to reach for greasy and sugary foods.

    Squeeze the day

    Energise your mornings with a glass of warm water and the juice of half a lemon. Add fresh or dried ginger for an extra kick. This boosts your immune system, aids digestion and naturally detoxes the body.

    Prevent added nerves, excessive sweating and dehydration

    Don’t overdo the caffeine – stick to 1-2 cups of coffee in the morning only. Avoid energy drinks completely, and stay hydrated with classic h2o and herbal teas. Brazil nuts, salmon, dark chocolate, oatmeal, eggs and leafy greens are known to induce a calming effect as well.

    Beauty starts from within

    For gorgeous hair, clear skin and a natural, camera-ready glow, incorporate more friendly fats such as walnuts, chia seeds, avocados, fatty fish and virgin olive oil into your diet well in advance.

    Boost your collagen by incorporating more foods with vitamin C (grapefruit, lemons, peppers, guavas, green veg) and protein-rich foods (eggs, fish, organic meat, nuts and seeds), and up your antioxidant intake with berries, leafy greens, beetroot, green and rooibos teas and turmeric.

    Avoid these:

    Soda and fizzy drinks, dairy, beans, excess caffeine and alcohol can all cause gas, nausea and bloating. Cruciferous veggies like broccoli, Brussel sprouts, cabbage and cauliflower, and foods containing wheat often lead to bloating too.

    Sugar, deep-fried and processed foods can lead to inflammation and fatigue. This will affect your overall mood and wellbeing, so avoid these as well.

    Instead, incorportae these foods into your diet if you want to avoid bloating and nausea:

    Asparagus, papaya, lemon, mint, ginger, cucumber, celery, brown rice, rolled oats, quinoa, grilled or steamed chicken and fish. Drink lots of water (but avoid sparkling) and herbal teas like peppermint and chamomile. Eat cooked instead of raw veggies for easier digestion, and take a good probiotic daily for extra gut support.

    Steer clear of any new, exotic or spicy foods- it may lead to indigestion, heartburn or an allergic reaction. Stick with what you know.

    ON THE DAY

    It is often one hectic marathon on the day of the wedding and you may not even get a chance to think about eating. However, breakfast is extremely important. This will give you the energy to meet and greet, avoid fatigue and stay cool, calm and collected for most of the day. Opt for something along the lines of: Oatmeal topped with fruit and nuts, eggs with sautéd veggies and avo, or a smoothie consisting of oats, banana/berries, almond milk, spinach, chia seeds and protein powder.

    It is important to stay well-hydrated as well, but rather sip on a little water at a time to avoid bloating and the constant need to run to the bathroom. Furthermore, ask your bride tribe to arrange a light lunch or to keep some snacks (such as nuts, biltong and salad bites) on hand for just before the ceremony and pre-reception.

    With the right fuel, you will look and feel your absolute best, with the energy, glow and confidence to enjoy every single precious moment of your big day!”

    Image: Unsplash

    Planning the perfect proposal is nerve-wracking, exciting and maybe even a little overwhelming, all bundled up neatly into one big knot in your stomach. Throw in an unfamiliar destination, and that knot gets a little bigger. But don’t fear, we’ve got the fool-proof guide to making it go as smoothly as possible:

    Do your research beforehand

    By planning ahead, you’ll take a little pressure off yourself as well as have more peace of mind about how it’s all going to play out. Have a plan of where, how and when you’d like to pop the question, but don’t expect it to work out exactly as you see it in your head. When the moment is right, you’ll know, but also don’t be too stressed about changing it up in case of unforeseenable elements, like the weather.

    That said, make sure you’re aware of what’s happeing in the area you’re planning to propose in, especially if you’ve never been there. Do a little internet search beforhand to see if any events are happening, if the area is a sacred place perhaps, or if  any of the areas are restricted. It will also be handy to look at popular scenic locations, or romantic spots that other people have popped the question at for some inspiration.

    Communicate with your hotel

    …or resort, B&B, or wherever you’re planning on staying. Even if you’re not planning to propose at the place you’re staying at, they’ll most likely make some extra effort to make it romantic for you if they know what your plans are. Some places even organise some complimentary champagne, a romantic dinner, or some rose petals in your room for after you’ve popped the question.

    Insure the ring

    Before you even leave for your getaway, make sure the ring is insured. Things happen, but if you’re planning to propose while away, it’s the last thing you’d want to worry about. Get the ring insured for in case a stone pops out, or heaven forbid, it gets misplaced or stolen. It’s the responsible thing to do anyway, plus it will put your mind at ease.

    Hide the ring, safely

    Packing is stressful enough as it is, or at least for some. But making sure the ring stays safely hidden from your fiance-to-be’s eyes is extra daunting. If you don’t want to worry about it falling out of your pocket, or your partner accidentally seeing it in your bag, pack it in your check-in luggage. However, if you’re scared of your luggage getting lost or delayed (because yes, these things happen), keep it safely stashed in your carry-on. Rather safe than sorry, right?

    Furthermore, if you’re worried about it being discovered at customs, it’s a good idea to place the ring box inside a bigger, nondescript box with a note inside to give the inspector or security guard a quick heads up in case they have to take a closer look.

    Don’t wait until the last minute to propose

    You want to wait for that perfect moment, but don’t wait until the last day of the trip. Nerves might not be your best friend, so your partner might notice that you’re acting a little differently. A little anticipation is good, especially if your partner is kind of expecting it, but if you propose earlier on, you’ll have more time to celebrate it in a special place.

    Don’t overthink it

    Sometimes it’s best to just go with your gut. If the moment feels right, go for it, even if it doesn’t go with your plans. Being spontaneous and it being unexpected sometimes makes the moment that much more special.

    Image: Unsplash