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Weddings

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So you’ve decided it’s just not a party unless everyone, big and small, is invited. Including kids in your big day can be sweet and meaningful, but also a lot of work.

Here’s how to make sure the lovely lilt of children’s laughter fills your day from start to sleepy finish, without any drama.

Spare them the ceremony
It’s perfectly acceptable to invite children to the reception but not to the ceremony, especially if it’s likely to be a long one. (This is when a babysitter will really come in handy, to entertain them off-site until the reception starts.)

Hire help
If the budget stretches, consider hiring a babysitter. That way both you and the parents can relax and enjoy the day knowing that their little ones aren’t getting into any danger – or mischief!

Plan their own party
What if you want to have flower girls and a little ring bearer, but would rather host an adults-only reception? Chat to the parents about arranging a fun evening for the kids after the ceremony – such as a sleepover at their friends’ house or a pizza party with a babysitter – and offer to cover any expenses. This way the kids won’t feel left out when everyone else goes to the reception, as they’ll have their own special plans!

Have a kids menu
Remember to factor in tiny tastebuds when drawing up the menu and drinks list. Canapés and a Cabernet may thrill your palate but they’re not going to do much for little rumbling tummies. A kids menu doesn’t have to involve fish fingers or greasy pizza – consider individual portions of delicious mac and cheese, gourmet sliders, or even a sophisticated French fry bar. Sparkling grape juice served in flutes for the tweens and teens will make them feel very grown-up.

Seat them correctly
It’s your choice whether the kids sit with their parents or at a designated children’s table. Just keep in mind that little grown-ups may not be amused at being stuck with the toddlers.

Keep them entertained
Remember that young attention spans aren’t the longest. Provide entertainment to keep them busy during speeches and other moments you’d prefer not to have an ‘I’m bored!’ break the spell. Wedding-themed colouring-in sets and join-the-dots games are great, and you can also get creative with I-spy lists and not-too-boisterous boardgames.

Crashlanding
Designate a room or screened-off area at the reception for naps, and fill it with comfy beanbags, pillows and blankets. Put a grandparent (or the babysitter) in charge of sending the little ones off for a lie-down before yawns and scrunched-up eyes cause mom and dad to cut short their time on the dance floor.

Baby boogie
Speaking of the dance floor, let your DJ know you’ll be having children in attendance so they can tailor the playlist accordingly. Explicit tracks may have to be swapped for radio-friendly versions, but perhaps a current teen favourite or singalong Disney song could be included so the little ones get some time on the tiles.

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A wedding is not only a legal step a couple takes to show commitment and union, it’s also a highly personal and cultural event.

The day is a celebration of love in all cultures around the world, but each one does it a little differently and that’s what makes them special. Wedding traditions can have deep sentimental meanings, or they can just be funny customs that have withstood the test of time for years.

In Afrikaans culture, wedding traditions are largely based on Christian beliefs, a strong part of the culture. The process of getting married is very similar to the white Western wedding many South Africans know, with a few additions here and there.

As with many cultural customs, some of the traditions have fallen away along the road due to the sheer expense they incur, or some just because they are deemed old-fashioned by a new generation. Nevertheless, many couples choose to uphold some of these special traditions.

1. Who pays for what – it’s complicated 

Times are tough but if budgets allow, there is a set-out way of going about the financing of the wedding. Traditionally, the bride’s father pays for the wedding, and the groom’s father pays for the bar. This is because both fathers, if they are the breadwinners, want to make the wedding an opportunity to spoil the newlyweds.

The groom would pay for the honeymoon –  and plan it all in secret. The bride arranges the wedding (the groom does not have much of a say there), but the groom decides where the new marriage is celebrated and arranges everything himself.

2. The bride gets given away by her father 

In traditional Afrikaans culture, a father would be seen as the protector of his family and especially his daughter. So, he would be the one to walk her down the aisle, and “give her away” to her husband, symbolically giving the responsibility of protecting her over to the husband in accordance with the Bible.

The bride would also wear a veil that covers her face as a symbol of modesty. The father then lifts the veil in front of the altar, allowing the groom to see her face. This also shows how the father gives the groom an opportunity to share an intimate moment with the bride. This is usually a very emotional moment, as it would be the first time the groom sees his bride that day.

3. It’s bad luck for the bride and groom to see each other the day before

This is where a bit of superstition comes in. According to folklore, the marriage is doomed to fail should the bride and groom catch a glimpse of each other on the day before the wedding. Usually, they also won’t communicate at all -making for some nervous brides and grooms most of the time! This adds excitement to the big day, and both are counting down the hours until they finally lay eyes on each other at the altar.

4. The husband must take the bride’s garter off with his mouth

During the reception, the real shenanigans begin. After dinner, it’s all fun and games. The bride has to wear a garter around one leg. Then, she is made to sit or stand on a chair with all the young people around her in a circle. The groom’s aim is to find the garter and remove it with his mouth – all with his eyes closed. If he can manage that, well, let’s just say they are in for a very pleasant marriage.

5. Young bachelors have their say while the groom makes a toast

Another funny tradition is for the groomsmen and/or the unmarried men at the wedding to try and embarrass the poor groom as much as possible while he tries to make a toast. As he stands to make a heartfelt speech to his lovely bride, the young men will yell good-intended insults, or sing silly songs to interrupt him.

6. The bride and groom cut the wedding cake together

All is good if there is food. No Afrikaans wedding is complete without a picture of the newlyweds cutting the cake together. The bride and groom will ceremoniously put their hands on the knife and make the first cut together. After that, it is 100% expected for them to each take a piece with their hands and feed each other with the messiest results possible.

7. Time to hit the dance floor 

While there is dancing involved in most weddings, Afrikaans people absolutely love to ‘sokkie’. There are no two ways about it: As soon as the dance floor opens, couples will grab each other by the hand for a good old ‘langarm’ (Afrikaans for “long-arm”, as this dance entails the couple to have one hand stretched out and holding the other). This truly traditional dance style happens to the tune of some banging Afrikaans pop music, and can involve some nifty twists and turns for those who really like to get down.

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It’s summer! If there ever was a time for beautiful and refreshing drinks, this is it. Whether you go the fruity way or the floral way and whether you choose the alcoholic or the non-alcoholic route, there’s something out there for you.

Choose a colour that suits your wedding’s theme so the drinks serve as decor too. Play around with different mixes and have some variety to tickle your guests’ tastebuds.

Here are a few different drinks styled to perfection to inspire you.

 

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American TV personality Gayle King and Oprah Winfrey are the best of friends.  It is thus no surprise that King’s daughter Kirby would tie the knot at Oprah’s Santa Barbara home.

Kirby Bumpus, who is Oprah’s goddaughter, married Virgil Miller in a small socially-distanced ceremony back in December 2020 after postponing their nuptials due to the pandemic.

King took to Instagram to make the announcement, writing “FINALLY fav daughter @kirbybump gave me permission to share the news she’s a married lady.. she & Virgil Miller tied the knot in super small service(6 people) @oprah house in December. Strict covid rules I couldn’t even hug her on her wedding day that was haaaaard!

“Not the wedding we planned in 2020 but my favorite son @willgb3 performed the ceremony… the day was gorgeous and so was kirby! I call that perfection.. swipe left for stunning pixs from @JoePug… thank you joe! Ps anybody have tips on being a good mother-in-law ?? Im all ears and taking notes!”

 

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The entire wedding process had to be tailored due to the COVID-19 pandemic. Dress fittings were held via Zoom and had her mom, along with Oprah and her best friend offered feedback virtually. On the big day, mom Gayle couldn’t even help her daughter get ready.

Her brother Will was not the original officiant choice, but he was the best option because h already had an officiant’s license.

“Nobody knows Kirby the way her brother does, so for him to do the ceremony felt meant to be,” Gayle told Oprah Magazine. “My son, Will, says, ‘We call ourselves a tripod, and that day with Virgil, we became a perfect square,'” Gayle says. “Kirby really is so happy, and nothing beats when your children are happy.”

Picture: Instagram / Gayle King

White will forever be associated with weddings, so why not lean into the theme with an all-white bridal look? Going for a monochromatic bridal bouquet is simple and classic, perfect for the understated bride. However, it doesn’t have to be boring.

Add texture and dimension by opting for 3-6 different flowers of varying sizes. From roses to lilies, baby’s breath to tulips, the options are endless. Go long and wide for some added drama by varying the lengths of your blooms.

Here are some beautiful blooming white bouquets you’ll love:

 

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Pink is one of the most romantic colours out there. The innocent sister of sultry red, pink shades are soft and subtle yet powerful at the same time.

This hue is perfect for spring and summer weddings, as it complements a lighter colour scheme. Pair with gold for a more regal feel, or go bold with reds for a unique finish. Of course, using varying shades of pink is also always sweet.

Here are some pretty in pink cakes to inspire your own:

 

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The Chinese government is growing increasingly worried as statistics reveal that fewer Chinese millennials are opting to tie the knot.

Data by China’s National Bureau of Statistics shows that between 2013 to 2019, the number of first-time marriages in China dropped by 41%, from 23.8-million to 13.9-million. The country’s marriage rate plummeted to 6.6 per 1,000 people in 2019, the lowest drop China has experienced in 14 years.

This decline is down to a number of reasons, although many sociologists focus on the decades of policies aimed at controlling the population, like the one-child policy, which meant that there are fewer young people in China that can actually get married.

Despite this policy being dropped in 2016, birth rates are still lower than usual. A preference for sons has also resulted in a skewed sex ratio at birth, especially in rural areas. More men than women mean that heterosexual men will struggle to find suitable brides.

Millennial women are also more educated and economically dependent than their elders, making marriage as a means of survival less necessary.

The Chinese government introduced a nine-year compulsory education program in the 1990s and expanded higher education to boost university enrollments in the late 90s. This has resulted in women outnumbering men in higher education programs.

As a result, many Chinese millennials view marriage as a personal choice rather than an obligation.

“With increased education, women gained economic independence, so marriage is no longer a necessity for women as it was in the past,”  Wei-Jun Jean Yeung, a sociologist at the National University of Singapore told CNN. “Women now want to pursue self-development and a career for themselves before they get married.”

The increased social and economic status of women has also made it harder for them to find partners of equal or higher stature, in accordance with Chinese tradition of ‘marrying up’.

While there have been many advances in education, cultural and gender norms still largely remain in China, which affects a woman’s role in marriage.

“The whole package of marriage is too hard. It’s not just marrying someone, it’s to marry the in-laws, take care of children — there are a lot of responsibilities that come with marriage,” Yeung said.

Women are also more hesitant to marry and start families as they are concerned with juggling a career and family life with all its demands.

This marriage decline may severely distress economic and social stability in the country, as marriage and reproduction are so closely related. As a result, the Chinese government is trying to mitigate a potential population crisis by introducing policies like the two-child policy, extended maternity leave and cash subsidies for those with two kids, and propaganda campaigns aimed at encouraging couples to have more children, reports CNN.

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Some colours are easy to incorporate in a wedding theme. Colours like white and green, for example can work almost no matter what you do with them. But, if you lean towards the sunnier side of life and love the colour orange, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t use it on your wedding day.

However, there are some key tips to keep in mind to make the colour work best.

Atmosphere

Firstly, you have to decide what atmosphere you want to create. It’s crucial, because this will determine all the pieces you get and the shades and tones you’re going to work with. What is the feel you’re going for? The “vibe”, if you will? Is it low-key and simplistic, or is it extravagant and glamorous? It can be earthy, hipster and natural. Or it can be sunny, joyful and jovial. Decide what you want your decor to say, then everything else will fall in place.

Textures

 

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Next, you need to determine what materials you will use. Plastic is out, for various reasons. Keep it classy, keep it glassy. For a nature-inspired look, go for wood, dried botanicals and coarse fabrics. For a more glamorous approach, think gemstones and bright coloured fresh flowers. Mix up the textures but make sure they are all aligned with your intended atmosphere.

Shades

You’re by no means confined to one shade of orange, but they have to work well together. Play around with samples, mix and match some different tones to see how they will look paired up. If you go rustic, burnt orange, tan and brown-orange will work well, paired with cream and copper table items. If you go vibrant, sunset orange colours will work lovely paired with lighter coloured items like white and gold.

Less is more

It can be easy to get carried away, but you must resist. Because orange is a strong colour, piling on too much of it can be overwhelming. Tone it down for a sleek, sophisticated look and you’re good to go. Simplicity is key, no matter the shades of orange you go for.

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Queen Elizabeth’s wedding cake earned itself the nickname “the 10 000 mile cake” after many ingredients had to be flown into England. This is because the big day took place shortly after WWII, and rationing was still in place.

However, this nickname has a double meaning, as the cake travelled far distances after the wedding as well.

The wedding cake made for The Queen and The Duke of Edinburgh’s 1947 wedding was a2.7 metre, 226 kg fruitcake, which featured four tiers and produced 2 000 slices that went to the wedding guests as well as nearby charities and organisations.

After the big day, one layer was preserved for the future christening of their first child, and another layer was sent to Australia to give thanks for the dried fruit flown in from the area. It has just been revealed that a slice of the wedding cake was also sent all the way to Nigeria.

UK-based charity Lepra, an international charity working to beat leprosy, recently tweeted out that their patron, The Queen,  helped sponsor children affected by leprosy through Lepra’s child adoption programme. She adopted one such girl named Budesta in 1956, thus ensuring she could continue her education and live a life of hope and freedom.

The Queen’s official Twitter account responded and said that she also sent a slice of the wedding cake to the girl guides at the Itu leprosy settlement in Nigeria.

Now that’s a sweet gesture.

Picture: Pinterest

White is the classic shade for a bride on her big day, but it’s not a set rule. Those who like to live life a little more boldly can opt for a fun pattern to brighten their bridal look.

Delicate floral prints are super popular in the wedding world. Add to the bottom of your skirt for a subtle look, or go big with an all-over pattern. Using a simple white base still offers that bridal look, with a lot more flair.

Here are some pretty patterns to inspire you:

 

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